The Irony of Bubblemates
by Ros3bud009
Summary: Doomed Dave is stuck in his bubble with the saddest excuse for a dead troll. But what he finds is that Tavros is ironically enjoyable company and perhaps the best bubblemate a human could ask for. Eventual Dave/Tavros, but not for a while yet.
1. Chapter 1

This was stupid. It was not even ironically stupid. It was stupid in a way that could be compared to the physical pain felt when looking through a computer screen at the stupidest thing ever and feeling that particular embarrassment for some poor sap that he had never met and never would.

Except that the poor sap was in his room.

That poor sap and he were living in a place where, so far as he was aware, time would never end and they would always both be there.

It was stupid to the point where, were he a weaker man, Dave would have considered seeing if it was possible to commit suicide even though he had already died. At this rate, he would be brain dead by morning.

Well, the closest thing to morning that one could have in a bubble made of memories that was floating in nothingness where space and time did not mean shit and the only populace were dead people and a fairy troll running around like the tour guide of death.

Considering post-death suicide definitely was looking more and more like a viable option.

"Uh, so," the troll standing in his bedroom asked after the fairy troll – Aradia, right? – left to do whatever was on her agenda next. He shifted from one foot to the other awkwardly, although for a moment a flash of what looked like a smile tugged at his lips. Anyone could tell the guy was feeling nervous.

Dave just stared at him and waited. No way was he helping this semi-retarded troll make this any less awkward. He came here to bring the sick fires, and he was going to have to actually start them if he wanted Dave to even consider giving a shit about them.

More shifting.

"Uh."

Now it was shifting from vaguely amusing to just damn painful. The loser really needed some help here.

"Look, Travis-"

"Tavros."

"Whatever. Are you somehow incapable of coming up with your shitty rhymes without the company of another troll around or something?" Dave inquired. "Do you draw your tiny vocabulary through some sort of telepathic troll link?"

"Uhhhhh, what, no way," came the reply as Tavros straightened his back up from where it had bowed when he was stumbling for words. His blank, dead eyes were creepy in an old b-movie sort of way. Dave assumed his probably were just as bad. "All my sick fires are, uh, homegrown! Er, well maybe not grown, but uh, home-started. They're all trademarked to Me, Myself, and uh, Not You Or Anyone Else."

Dave shrugged. "Right."

"You're just totally impressed, right?"

"You know, your waxing romantic about your boner for me was more impressive than your trying to convince me that you are any good at rap battles."

And there was the face that Dave had never had the chance to see through the brown font and funky choice is writing style; Tavros blinked and then, as it sunk in, he looked every bit the embodiment of sheer awkwardness and embarrassment.

"Uh. Can we not do that again?"

"Talk about your passion to finally get your desperate little grey fingers around my throbbing symbol of boyhood?"

Being grey and all, Dave was not sure if it was possible for a troll to blush. But assuming that there was no other reason for Tavros' face to slowly turn a brownish color, that unasked question was answered without a word.

"Dave, that is really something I'd rather, uh, not talk about."

The boy shrugged and turned to leave the room. "Didn't know you were so shy about your desperation for me that's so strong you had to seek me out after death. But being the generous soul I am, I won't force you to confront your hunger for my man-sausage."

Tavros followed him out of the room, stumbling over his own feet but managing to keep his balance. "Whoa, wait, stop saying that like it's the truth."

"You can't even stand to not be in a different room than me. The evidence speaks for itself."

The footsteps behind him stilled. "I, uhhhh, I can definitely not be in the same room. I am so super ok with being alone." The declaration was ignored. Dave made it to the TV and sat down, deciding that what he really needed right now was to forget everything and just immerse himself in some mad virtual boarding.

It was not long though until Tavros could no longer stand the awkwardness of standing in the apartment by himself. It was then that he did the most ridiculous run-and-jump-to-land-on-a-couch-like-a-smooth-motherfucker that Dave had ever seen. He tripped over his own feet – Jegus, did all trolls have terrible control of their feet? – and fell face-first, resulting in those huge ass horns ripping into the couch and burying themselves deep into the cushions. This stopped them dead in their tracks, causing Tavros' body that was still under the whims of inertia to flip over them and he landed on his back. His ankles hit the arm of the couch and Tavros yelped loudly. However, when he reached down to cradle his injured appendages, he could not reach since his horns were still hooked into the fabric and refused to let him lift his head off the couch. In fact, as it was his back was arched and his neck cricked at an odd angle as the horns seemed to have tangled with the metal springs, refusing to move from standing perpendicular to the couch surface.

Dave could not help the snort that escaped him. If he had recorded it, no doubt the video would have been the most watched on youtube within hours. Assuming that youtube still existed. Or that there was anyone to view it.

After a round of game play – riding pixilated rails until the skateboard got caught on nothing and simply continued to grind on a single spot, gaining points like they were mating rabbits and refusing to relent until Dave restarted the game – and Tavros awkwardly stuttered out requests for assistance – mixed in with terrible raps that were meant to hurt Dave's pride as a man as well as his goat's – Dave finally got up and helped Tavros escape the clutches of the evil couch.

Dave did not taunt Tavros about proceeding to sit next to him like a puppy that could not even conceive of the idea of being alone or anywhere that his master was not. Although, being able to use the phrase master and use it to troll the awkward troll next to him was tempting.

Instead he just played and explained the game to Tavros as he started a new round. Of course, Dave made sure to be as condescending about it as possible. In turn, Tavros managed a few choice jabs over the ridiculousness of the game. Trolls just did not understand the concept of ironically enjoying things that should not be enjoyable.

It was stupid, but Dave was starting to consider that this was an acceptable level of stupidity.

Tavros was terrible at rapping, he was the worse troll in all existence, and he had ruined Dave's memory couch. He was the worse bubble-mate that a dead guy could ever fear to have. He seemed to have some unspoken decision that he was going to stay in Dave's bubble for a while.

And he was ironically enjoyable company.

* * *

><p>"You're garbage at this."<p>

"Wha—no, I uh, shut up! I'm learning!"

"It's been two hours and you only have a thousand points."

Tavros frowned and stared at the screen intently, attempting to mash the buttons under his thumbs again. There was a jump, a spin, and then bright red pixels bursting out randomly as the virtual skater's face became acquainted with the concrete for the umpteenth time. "Uhhh."

"Total garbage."

"No, give me a second! I, uh, totally almost have a hang of it," Tavros swore. "Uh, you'll see. I'll grind some serious rail and you know, be so sick that the game will do that uh, well, that thing where it stops but doesn't-"

"Glitch."

"Yeah! I'll, uh, make it glitch so hard!"

Dave shrugged and replied, "Whatever. Just tell me when you're done humiliating yourself and I can show you how to really glitch a game out."

There was no response as the troll boy focused all his attention on the screen. So serious was Tavros about succeeding, proving that he could figure out the game controller. His lips were drawn tight and occasionally he would nibble on his bottom lip with teeth that looked like they belonged on a savage beast, and not a failure of a troll that could not figure out how to work a controller.

But sharp teeth were not on Dave's mind. While he did not mean to, Dave couldn't help watching Tavros' dead eyes when the other was not looking. They were frankly really weird. It was not like they were a white slate where eyes used to be; they were still spherical and creepily enough moved like any normal eye would. However, without any iris or pupil, there was no way to tell where Tavros was looking. The most Dave could figure out was that the troll's gaze was moving left or right, up or down.

Whereas before Dave compared them to b-movie quality, now they were quickly rising to the stuff of zombie-movies from the last couple of years.

It probably did not bother Tavros since he could not see his own eyes and never saw Dave's anyway, what with the sunglasses.

But it was starting to bother Dave.

"Tavros."

"Mm?" The troll kept playing, and as far as Dave could tell he did not glance over.

"I'm gonna go find a sharpie and draw some pupils on your eyes, alright?"

The glassy eyes swiveled, and now Dave knew that the troll was looking at him. It helped that his eyes grew wider and his brows shifted between raised and furrowed. "What?"

"Sharpie. Draw pupils in your eyes. Not too difficult a concept to understand."

"Uh, well, I think I object to things going in my eyes." Tavros shifted and scooted a couple inches away. Dave made sure to keep his perfect poker face in place as he shifted to close the gap and more. It was simply too easy.

"It's not like it's a big deal. Just need to hold your eyes open while I color them in. I'll even let you choose what they look like," Dave stated as he moved, as if to touch Tavros' eye. The troll jolted and fell backwards, rolling away as he stuttered out objections.

Just like that, Dave picked up the now discarded game controller and made himself comfortable against the couch.

It took a full minute before Tavros finally asked quietly, "Uh, Dave?"

"Yeah?"

"You weren't, uhh, serious, were you? You were just messing with me."

Dave slid the virtual skater up a ramp and angled it just right to get the board stuck on nothing. With the slightest grin he glanced over at Tavros. "Yup. It was really too easy."

Tavros' reaction had been estimated by what behavior Dave had already observed, and he had predicted the outcome. However, what Dave had not predicted was the felt-covered rump that collided with his face with surprising strength. He could not help flinching and batting it away. "What the hell?"

"I'm so going to, uh, get you back for that," Tavros insisted as he slowly crawled over to sit next to Dave again.

"That was your idea of revenge? A puppet rump to the face? Felt dong to the noggin?"

"That's only the beginning! Uhhh, I'm gonna draw big, dumb looking girl eyes on your eyes when you're, you know, sleeping or something," Tavros explained. "The biggest, dumbest girl eyes! They'll, uh, be rainbow colored and uhhh, have big lashes and stuff!"

"Dude, that's harsh."

"Oh yeah. It'll, you know, be uh, the harshest."

"I mean, wow, eyelashes on my eyeballs? Talk about shitty," Dave continued. The skater was still spinning in circles like a dancer in a music box on steroids. Tavros laughed a bit, and it was not as annoying as Dave had thought it would be.

"Dave, you'll, uh, have the shittiest eyes. Uhhh, that's a promise!"

The boy smirked as he restarted the game and handed the controller back to the troll.

"I look forward to it."

* * *

><p>"Dave, uh, I'm gonna have some food from your, um, what do you call it again?"<p>

"What's your phrase for it?"

"Uhh, the thermal hull?"

"You mean the fridge?"

"Uh, I dunno, sure?"

"Would calling it a refrigerator help?"

"Oh. Yeah, that uh, that makes sense. I didn't know that, you know, you were so sophisticated."

"…Sure. Anyway, I wouldn't suggest you open that-"

"Wha—Oh goguahhhhh!"

"Put the swords back when you're done screaming like a little girl, ok?"

* * *

><p>The two did not always have something to talk about. In fact, it was rare for them to have long, continuous conversations since they did not have much in common, and what they did have in common they did not want to talk about. It was a lifetime that had passed them both by.<p>

Dave did not like to think about the fact that reality was existing with a Dave, and that Dave was not him.

Whatever worries Tavros had went unspoken, but there must have been something since he did not bring up his life that had passed.

Dave could have asked about being a troll from troll-world, but he found that he did not really care. Tavros in turn only expressed interest in the worlds of the video games that Dave played. Neither seemed to want to think about the reality they were not a part of anymore, let alone talk about it.

It definitely did not help that everywhere Dave looked, there were Bro's posters and puppets laying around, as if waiting for their owner to return.

He was not sure which was weirder: that he was not a part of reality anymore, or that Bro was not either.

Maybe eventually Dave would want to leave the apartment and check out the new world of living in a bubble. Check out other bubbles that bumped into theirs. Or, well, Dave's that Tavros was bumming around in.

But for now Dave was alright with playing endless video games and Tavros seemed satisfied watching.

Why rock the boat?


	2. Chapter 2

The first of the pair to finally tilt the boat just a bit was not Dave, but Tavros.

"Uh, Dave?"

Dave was in his room setting up his turntables for a rad jamfest. Even video games had that point where enough was enough, and churning out ill rhymes was always a good way to pass the time, even if time did not matter anymore. With a sigh he moved to his door and leaned out to see what the troll was up to. Hopefully he had not ruined more of Dave's bubble furniture.

Tavros was standing by the window, his face all but smashed against the glass as he looked outside. When he finally looked over his shoulder at Dave, he had the dumbest grin on his face. The troll was damn near bouncing on his feet.

Dave quirked a brow at him. "You can't be serious."

"Uhhhhh, but I haven't even said anything yet."

"It's pretty obvious you want to go for a walk." Even if he had not already been positive that that was what the troll wanted to do, the way Tavros' toothy – or, if one were to be more accurate, fangy – smile widened would have given him away. Dave had to fight the urge to roll his eyes. "Christ, could you be any more like a dog?"

Tavros blinked. "Do dogs go for walks?"

Dave decided that he did not particularly want to discuss the habits of canines.

"The door is unlocked. I'm not stopping you. Go gallivant to your heart's content."

Assuming that the conversation was over, Dave returned to his sound mixers. A flip of the switch and the room filled with a simple beat. The boy turned some knobs and flipped some switches and listened as the beat crooned and hiccupped until it was perfect.

"That's, uh, a pretty rad beat."

Dave stiffened and looked over his shoulder. Tavros was standing behind him, not looking the least bit worried about how much he was invading the boy's personal space. It did not help that he was taller by a good couple of inches and despite his pathetic personality he actually had some muscle on his still growing frame.

How he had any muscle on his frame was a mystery to Dave. He decided to just assume it was a troll thing.

For a moment Dave wondered if the two of them would grow at all now that they were dead.

"I thought you wanted to go outside."

"Uh, yeah, but, uhhh, well," Tavros stammered, shifting awkwardly. "I don't, you know, uh, know my way around, and uh, stuff."

With a groan, Dave started to turn off his turn tables. "Yeah, alright, I get it. You can't stand to be parted from me, etcetera and so forth."

"That's not, uh-"

"It is. We both know you're like a moon orbiting my dick. Just can't help yourself."

"Whoa, no, that's not-"

Finally the machines ceased their humming. With that settled, Dave turned and walked out of the room, ignoring Tavros' protests against any suggestions that he was drawn to Dave in such suggestive terms. For every protest, the boy would retort with exceeding more purple prose about all the unexpressed sexual desires that the troll was hiding behind his façade of bashfulness.

By the time they reached the elevator, Tavros seemed to have figured out that it would be best to just keep his mouth shut before his head exploded from all the blood rushing into it. There was no winning against Dave's human innuendoes, and Dave never got tired of dishing them out. That awkward brown blush was quickly becoming Dave's favorite shade.

Ironically, of course.

* * *

><p>It became blatantly obvious that there were no such things as troll elevators. It was amazing to think that teleporting could become old hat, but something like an elevator could have the troll stammering ceaselessly as he clung to the handrail, asking again and again what was happening and was it safe. In return, Dave merely shrugged.<p>

Once the doors were open, Tavros tumbled out as quickly as he could, spinning and looking around. It was like when a bird got stuck inside and was trying to figure out how to get out again.

Luckily for Tavros, Dave did not have his sword on him to accidently impale him with.

When the troll noticed the way that Dave was staring at him with his brow perfectly quirked, he stood up straight again and stated, "Uhh, that wasn't so bad."

"You smell that?" Dave asked as he stepped out of the elevator coolly. "Pretty sure it smells like shit." He walked past Tavros, tapping on the troll's horn as he passed. "I'd almost be so bold as to say it smells like bullshit."

"No, uh, that is the smell of, um, my totally chillness."

"So your chillness is bullshit."

"What? No." If Tavros had anything else to say, it was lost as Dave walked out towards the lobby and then out of the building. Just as he had remembered it – concrete and asphalt as far as the eye could see, wide open sky, the works.

All it was missing was the people.

But Tavros did not know that. No matter how vaguely disappointing it was to Dave, the troll looked around as if the scene was something that was as far from normal as the troll was from being cool. "Whoa. This is where you live?"

"Yeah. It's called a city. Heard of them?"

"Yeah, but uh, never went to one," Tavros replied as he took note of the sidewalk under his feet. "And you know, those were, uh, troll cities."

"Troll cities? On a planet of trolls? Pull out the axe, give me a few good whacks, shout timber and call me stumped."

"Wait. Was that, uh, an innuendo mixed in with your pun?"

"If you want it to be, sweet cheeks."

"Uhhhh, what?"

"Don't worry about it, sugartits."

"What?"

"Just shut up and start walking," Dave replied. The troll paused, but that seemed to be all the motivation he needed. At first, Tavros just walked, albeit with the stupidest grin on his face and a hop in his step that almost made it like a skip. Dave was in a constant battle with the need to roll his eyes. It did not help that Tavros would ask about the buildings and the streets and the cars the way a five year old might.

His stammering turned to all out stuttering. The troll seemed so excited that it was hard for him to even figure out how to get his tongue to move right. Tavros was like a bundle of barely contained excitement next to Dave. Every stride was turning up the heat under the bubbling pot of troll excitement that was ready to boil over.

Finally, without warning, what was walking turned into an all out dash. Dave just watched as Tavros abandoned him to speed down the street, his arms pumping and his feet hitting the asphalt. Once he'd gone for several blocks, Tavros slowed just enough to jog in a circle and, finally, gave up running altogether to jump around. He cheered and yelled at the top of his lungs, fists raised towards the sky. Even from the distance, he looked like a child that had been informed it was Christmas, his birthday, _and _the day he was going to get laid all rolled into one.

Dave tried to come up with some sort of insult about his behavior, but by the time Tavros had raced back over to him, panting and looking nothing but truly happy, nothing came out.

Even when the boy found himself enveloped in strong arms and lifted off the ground, receiving the hardest hug he could remember, the sound of unbridled laughter muffled any words he could have said beyond a grunt. All Dave could do was look, his eyes wide behind his sunglasses, and it was probably for the best that his eyes were shielded from how brightly Tavros smiled.

His teeth were goofy, but that did not keep the smile from being attractive.

It was only as Tavros' knees wobbled and threatened to buckle that Dave found his words again. "Fuck, seriously, put me down, dumbass."

Tavros just laughed and adjusted his grip, jostling Dave a bit in his arms as he did so. Dave made a noise that he would never admit to making or even being capable of making and grabbed onto the troll's horns for balance. His sunglasses slipped down his nose, but luckily they stayed on his face. "Tavros! Get a grip on your ecstasy trip and put me down!"

"But I can run!" Tavros cheered. "I can run and jump and hold people up and-"

Tavros' knees buckled and this time he could not readjust. The troll fell backwards and what little equilibrium Dave had while being carried was gone, along with some of his dignity which he feared he would never regain.

Even with what had to be a bruised ass and scraped arms, Tavros still just laughed and laughed, sprawled out on the ground and no doubt wiggling his little troll toes in his shoes.

Dave did not complain about his cut up knees. Instead he just readjusted his glasses and sat on Tavros' chest, waiting for this mania to pass before the idiot could get up and do anything else.

Whether or not he enjoyed the view was a separate and entirely inappropriate question. Even if it were to be asked, and even if Dave were to answer honestly without remixing his words like an ill rap, at that moment there was nothing that could be identified as an inappropriate emotion.

It was simply nice to see Tavros happy.

* * *

><p>"So, you're saying you were a cripple?"<p>

"Uhh, yeah. Not like, you know, for my whole life. Just later. And um, I did have metal legs for a while!"

"Metal legs."

"Yeah. Never really got a hang of them though."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. Stairs are, um, really surprisingly difficult."

"…"

"Uhh, what?"

"Nothing. Just enjoying the mental image of you falling down stairs."

"That's not very nice."

"Well, neither was tearing my knees to shreds on the concrete cause you were carrying me around like a lunatic. I told you to put me down."

"Uhhh, you know, I am starting to suspect I'm not good at, you know… following advice and stuff."

"Don't tell me someone warned you about the stairs too."

"Then, uh, I won't tell you about that."

"You're such a fucking moron."


	3. Chapter 3

It was only when Tavros had his party rest in the hotel to regain their health that Dave blinked up at the ceiling from where he was laid out on his mangled couch. As the little pixilated figure slipped into the boxy bed realization hit him.

"Do we need sleep anymore?"

"Uhh," Tavros started, turning his head to look at Dave; the boy coolly reacted and moved without a thought to avoid candy corn troll horns in his face. "What?"

"Sleep. We've been awake for a while now. I don't even know if it's just been hours or days. But I've never felt like I need to sleep," Dave specified.

The troll frowned and turned back to play the game. Finally he said, "I dunno. I've, uh, never tried it."

"Course you haven't. I'd have notice you conked out on my couch."

"No. Uh, I mean before I came to your bubble."

After considering that statement for a moment, Dave came to the conclusion that there were two ways to go in the conversation now. He could stick with the topic at hand – namely sleep – or he could explore the reason why Tavros was here at all. As tempting as it was to delve into the troll's thoughts, Dave had started a mission to figure out an aspect of living in this bubble, and he was going to see it through before he started in on any sort of psychoanalysis.

That was more Rose's shtick anyway.

For a moment, Dave wondered how she was doing in reality.

What was it with this bubble and his thoughts always digressing?

"Why don't we try it?"

"Uhh, what?"

"Sleeping."

Tavros paused the game but did not turn to look at Dave just yet. Instead he simply fidgeted a bit as he said, "Why? If we're not tired, then uh, why bother?"

"Call it experimentation."

"I don't, uhh, really like experiments."

"Then you don't have to try." Dave sat up and swung his legs off the couch, getting to his feet. His arms were stretched over his head as he walked between Tavros and the TV to head towards his bedroom, saying, "You can stay out here and do whatever you want. You know how to work the elevator and the TV. Just make sure I wake up eventually."

Instead of just continuing to play like Dave had assumed the troll would do, Tavros dropped the controller and started to scramble to his feet. "Whoa, uh, wait, you mean, you're just going to go sleep and, uh, leave me alone?" he asked with what seemed to be pure, unironic worry.

It seemed that Dave had himself a clinger – just what he needed in his dream memory bubble thing for the rest of forever.

"Dude, I'm just going to be in the next room. I think you'll be ok."

"Uhh, well, yeah, of course I will be!" Tavros tried to backtrack as his dignity caught up with the rest of him. "I just don't, um, want to be, you know, alone I guess? I don't need company, but uh, I want it, so-"

Dave interrupted saying, "Tavros, seriously, keep that in your pants for two seconds, ok? Just find something to do for a couple hours. Christ."

"Uhh, ok," Tavros finally conceded, his shoulders visibly drooping. But still his brows furrowed, as if the troll was scraping for another argument. It was almost pathetic how clingy he was being.

"Is there, uh, things to do in your room?"

There was no almost about it really. It was just plain ol' pathetic.

"Whoa, should have warned me you were a bit of a creeper. I haven't even known you for more than like, a couple hours or a day or two or however long it's been, and now you can't let me sleep without getting up in my grill? That's pretty intense," Dave stated. Tavros fidgeted.

It was silent then. Dave was in no hurry. They had all of eternity, and if it took the troll a while to get his tongue to work right, so what? The troll needed to deal with his being a clingy bitch if this was going to work.

Since when did this even need to work?

"Is that, uh, unacceptable?"

"Unless I'm secretly a desperate high school girl and you're secretly an attractive vampire who is in love with me because of the way my blood smells, yeah, kinda."

"What? Is Terazi a, um, whatever you just said?"

Dave groaned and shook his head, replying, "No, no, Christ no. Just forget that. I forgot that such sophisticated allusions to human literature would be beyond you."

"Oh. Then I can just, uh, hang out in your room while you sleep?"

"Seriously, Tavros, you're giving me all the worst kind of goosebumps here," Dave stated.

The troll squirmed, his sharp fang teeth digging into his lips. They had to be pretty durable if they were not constantly bleeding from self-inflicted fang impalement. Finally, after a few false starts, in a way that tried to be nonchalant but fell flat on its face in the process Tavros admitted "Uhh, I was kind of alone for a long time in my bubble, so uh, I don't really want to, you know, be alone again for a while. That's, uh, all. I don't really need to-"

That, ultimately, was all Dave needed to know. It was still pathetic, and Dave did not consider him the hero type, but this was something even he could deal with. The rest of the troll's words were ignored. Dave took a note from his Bro's book and coolly slipped his arm around Tavros' shoulders – which given his slightly superior height was awkward, and really, Bro had it easy compared to this. But Dave was certain he pulled it off like the cool kid he was. Leading the troll towards his room was surprisingly easy, even if he was stuttering and asking what Dave was doing with every step.

When Dave released him and started to undo his pants, Tavros had an all out panic attack. The boy just smirked at the poor hyperventilating mass of anxiety.

"Hate to break it to you, since you're obviously pretty excited," Dave said as he shimmied out of his pants. Tavros was covering his face with his hands, his eyes clenched shut behind them and his face practically a golden brown from how much he was blushing. A snort escaped before Dave could stop it. "But I just happen to prefer sleeping in my boxers. You're gonna have to try harder to get me outta these."

There was a pause before Tavros peeked between his fingers to find that indeed, Dave was still in his boxers – red with white hearts; one of several gag gifts from Bro that Dave took to wearing since it was so ironic on so many levels of irony. Confusion passed the troll's face.

"Uhh, wait. You wear shorts under your pants?"

Dave cocked his brow so that it arched above his sunglasses. "Please tell me trolls wear underwear."

"What?"

"Underwear. Stuff you wear under your clothes."

"Uh, no, not really. That sounds kind of, uh, weird."

"…Motherfuckers."

* * *

><p>The sleeping wear issue was quickly resolved once the human boy had his mind completely wrapped around the idea of this dorky troll in front of him letting it all hang out in his pants like it was no big deal. This in and of itself was no easy feat, but the boy managed it. Dave gave Tavros some of his pajama bottoms that he never wore and told the troll to change his disgusting un-underweared ass in the bathroom. The black bottoms with "Team Cullen" written down the side in silver were so ironic that Dave could not help the snicker that slipped through his lips. Tavros asked what was so funny, but the boy refused to let him in on the joke.<p>

Next time he was going to make him wear the Slytherin ones.

After that one would have to be the infamous Sponge Bob pajama set.

Tavros was the perfect model for all the fangirly shit that Dave owned with enough irony that it practically oozed out of his drawers. No doubt it was because the troll did not know anything about what he was wearing, but yet they suited him so well, as if they were made for his ignorant body.

The irony was practically palpable.

What was more difficult and far less ironic was figuring out the sleeping arrangement. Tavros did not want to sleep in another room, but all that Dave had in his room was a twin-sized bed. Doable, but not without getting close enough that it was everything but spooning. No doubt that would have given the troll a stroke. While the futon couch could be kicked a few times until it laid out flat, there was a gaping hole it. Easy to avoid when sitting on the couch, but harder to do the same when sleeping on it with someone else. Not to mention he did not dare test the fates by giving them a chance to have the futon rip apart underneath his prone body.

Bro's room was completely and totally off-limits.

There was no way that Dave was sleeping on the floor.

When Tavros said he could do that, Dave waved that idea off without a second thought. Cool dudes knew when they had to be courteous asshats, and there was no way he could let a guest sleep on the carpet. That was way rude in all the worse ways. It did not matter that there were no longer any old ladies within even the neighboring galaxies, let alone next door. The mere thought of having someone sleep on his floor while he slept in a bed made his ears hurt like they were getting the harshest pinching of their little ear lives.

Ultimately, all but spooning on Dave's twin-sized bed was the only viable option, regardless of Tavros' feelings on the matter. There was no refusing Southern hospitality, especially when it was of the cool kid variety.

Tavros did not really understand the concept but once the blanket was shoved into his arms, it was clear that it did not matter if he understood. This was going to happen.

Dave took his own sheet – they were not going to share the blankets since that would be a whole new level of potential awkwardness for the troll and maybe, a bit, for the human boy – and took up the territory next to the wall. Tavros awkwardly sat down next to him. It took about fifteen minutes of him stammering out how totally not sexual the whole thing was before Dave pinched his ass and told him to lay the fuck down.

It turned out that trolls did not really have beds. As soon as the words recuperacoon and spoor slime were in the air, Dave decided he really did not care at all. Tavros was sleeping in his bubble, and there was none of that freaky troll shit chilling here. The bed was going to have to be his new best sleeping buddy.

Tavros admitted that the recuperacoon had not been a very good sleeping buddy anyway.

The horns were momentarily a problem, but in the end Dave just scooted down the bed a bit, taking the pillow with him. He was still short enough that his feet would not dangle over the end.

Correction. The bed was long enough to hold his perfectly acceptable at his age height.

Dave really hoped that he was going to be able to at least grow up until his body was at some point past puberty. At that point it could stop, but this whole being thirteen business just was not going to cut it.

That was how the two found themselves laying side-by-side in Dave's bed, wrapped up in their separate blankets and making sure that their shoulders did not touch, even if that meant being in a slightly awkward position. Eventually Dave decided he did not give a shit and moved so that he had his hands under his head. His elbow bumped against Tavros' ear, he made an awkward noise, but after that it was over.

However, sleep was not going to settle just yet.

* * *

><p>"Dave?"<p>

"Hm?"

"Are you going to, uhh, sleep with your glasses on? Wouldn't it be better if you took them off?"

"Shades. And it's fine. I won't break them."

"Uhh, but, wouldn't it be better to not have to make sure they're, um, safe?"

Dave shrugged and settled back into the bed. His elbow bumped against the troll's ear. "I can't be seen without my glasses. It would let down all my fans. The intrigue is what keeps the bitches circling."

"Uhh," was Tavros' response to that particular comment. "But, won't they look like mine now anyway? It's not, uh, really a mystery that they'll be white."

"Man, it's not about the eyes," Dave replied the slightest hint of disdain. "Everyone always assumes it's the eyes. They were fine before I was dead. In fact, they were really rad. If you could have seen them, they would have given you all sorts of rude thoughts."

Tavros shifted awkwardly next to Dave, pulling his sheets even closer to his body. "So, uh, I'm going to ignore the innuendo in there," he decided. "If it's not about your eyes, then uhh, why? Is it the glasses?"

Dave turned his head to look at the troll, but due to his horn Tavros could not turn his head in return now that it was flat against the bed. Instead he had to raise his head a bit and tilt just enough that he could see Dave's face. But the boy did not speak right away. Rather, he was considering the troll laying next to him. What harm could this dork do? Dave could give him all the dirt on everything, and Tavros would not even know that he could possibly use it against him.

Finally, Dave shrugged and laid back down. "I've just always worn them. Can't remember a single day that went by without a pair of shades on my face."

"You mean you've never, uh, taken those glasses off?"

"Don't be stupid. These shades are new," Dave explained. "Got them from John. His celebrity man crush wore them at some point, so he felt the need to send them to me for my b-day. It's almost bromantic enough to bring a tear to your eye."

Tavros gapped at him. "Whoa, uh, wait. Whoa. So you and John-"

"Stop that train of thought right there. Bromance and romance are two totally different things," Dave interrupted, lifting a hand to make his point clear. "There is nothing between us beyond a rad bromance. No disco sticks are being ridden."

"Uhh, what?"

Dave sighed and idly moved his finger through the air, as if to make a square. "Look, you guys have your weird quad thing, right?"

"Quadrants."

"Whatever. We'd be in the one that's all best friends forever and shit without sex. Got it?"

Tavros took a moment to consider it before nodding weakly. "I guess so. So you're, uh, moirails? Wow."

Dave suspected there had probably been something lost in translation, but it was not like it mattered. John would never know that their relationship had been defined by troll romance, so where was the harm.

"So, you wear the glasses because they're a gift from, uh, your moirail?"

"Let's just call him my bromantic partner, ok?" Dave suggested. The irony of the whole situation was killing him, but he managed to keep a straight face. "And no. I've been wearing shades long before I met John. Nothing cool starts with John."

"Oh. Then, uh, you had a different pair before?" Tavros was obviously doing his best to keep up with all the new information.

Dave counted on his fingers for a moment. "Yeah. I've had about five or six pairs. Maybe more, since when I was a little dude, I wasn't as careful as I am now with them."

"Uhh, wait, you're serious about having glasses-"

"Seriously, they're shades."

"—shades, even as a little human grub?" Tavros finished, looking no less confused. Dave could not blame him. That level of cool was beyond most people.

"I was christened with the gift of awesome shades from the moment that Bro came upon my sweet baby self and slipped a pair of pure coolness upon my rapt face."

Tavros' eyes widened a bit, as if suddenly he understood. "Oh! So, then, uh, you wear them since they were your first gift from your, um, human lusus."

"Bro," Dave corrected. There was a pause, but the boy did not let it last long enough for Tavros to get suspicious. "He's my Bro. I guess he was also kind of my dad, so I guess he's my brodad. But yeah. Bro gave them to me and they were pretty slick, so I stuck with them."

"He sounds, uh, really cool."

"You don't even know. He's the king of cool. Even with the puppets."

"Uhh, right."

"Yeah. He's really cool. Though I guess now it's kind of past tense. Huh."

With that, Dave rolled over so that he was facing the wall and away from Tavros. He assured himself there was no reason for it beyond comfort. Definitely. It did not matter that usually he always slept on his back – when sleeping in the same bed as a troll, surely the rules of what normally felt comfortable when sleeping changed. It had nothing to do with not wanting to talk about his shades anymore. It had nothing to do with not wanting to talk about Bro.

It had nothing to do with the ache in his chest from visions of a memory that was not even his, but another Dave's, of a body he never got the chance to mourn over, that was just so removed from his bubble that he was not sure he ever could.

Next to him, Tavros shifted awkwardly, and the sheets under Dave's body were pulled as the troll's horn pushed down on the bed. No doubt the biggest fail troll of all time that was behind him was somehow awkwardly laying on his side and looked beyond retarded with his stupid huge horns and his goofy teeth sticking out and that hair that looked like a throwback to a time that should have never happened.

The biggest irony of it all was that Dave had lived his life as the cool kid with the coolest Bro, and now he was some cast off doomed result from a branch timeline who was stuck in a bubble in nowhere and no time. To top it all off, the only person available to show any concern for him was an alien twink that was a failure even by his own species' standards.

"Dave?"

No. No, that was not the biggest irony.

What was most ironic was that Dave appreciated Tavros' presence.

The boy sighed and rolled back over, not giving a single shit for how close he was to Tavros now. Even as the troll sucked in his breath and awkwardly stammered that he could move back to where he was or even get off the bed, Dave just coolly slid off his glasses. The garbled words slowed as Tavros blinked at him, staring pretty intently at his eyes. Dave cocked a brow.

"So. They look as dead as yours?"

"Uh, kind of. But they're kind of pink where your, uh, colored part of the eye should be."

The slightest curl pulled at Dave's lips. "Cool. I wouldn't want to just have regular dead eyes. Just throw some eyelashes on these bad boys and they'll win every shitty eyeball pagent."

Tavros snorted in a way that almost sounds like a giggle. Dave mentally took back the part about his teeth being goofy in a negative light. They were still goofy, but not in a bad way.

Dave stretched out on the bed before lazily moving his hand, his shades carefully cradled against his palm. His fingers relaxed and held the shades out in front of Tavros' smiling face. The troll's smile faltered with something like confusion. "Uh, Dave?"

"Put them on," was all that Dave said, making sure to steel his face to keep anything from slipping. Tavros' eyes moved, and up close Dave noticed that there was a faint outline where the iris was supposed to be. The troll was looking at him and then back at the shades. Carefully, making sure to shift all his weight to the arm he was leaning on, Tavros picked up the offering and attempted to put them on. It was hard for him to manage with only one hand and with his ears not quite the same as a human's. Ultimately, Dave had to help him out.

But finally, after some adjustment, the shades settled on Tavros' nose. The troll honestly looked like the biggest tool Dave had ever seen in them. The shades did nothing to improve his painfully low level of coolness.

Dave could not stop the small smile from sneaking onto his face. All he could do really was attempt to twist it to look more smug than pleased.

"As a former Knight of Time, I proclaim you, Tavros the troll, an official housemate of the Strider kingdom."

Tavros went completely still next to him. Dave was not sure that the troll was even breathing anymore. The boy was about to ask if he was overdosing on awesome when finally Tavros whispered, "Uhh, does this, uh, I mean, do you, um, do you actually want me, uhhh, to be your—I mean, no one has ever, before, in person or anything-"

"Seriously. Spit it out."

"Do you actually want me to be around and live here and be your friend?" Tavros said in a sudden rush before going silent again. Even with the shades obscuring his eyes, it was easy to read the hope and fear crossing his face. The troll was at a complete loss for how to react, unsure of if he should actually believe Dave, hope that he would be accepted, or recognize how much he wanted to be wanted in any way.

It should have been heart wrenching, but Dave could not help snorting.

"If you're going to take this position seriously, you're gonna have to stop worrying like a sad sack of self-esteem issues. Trust me when I say I don't hand over my shades to just anyone unless I'm dead serious."

"So, uh, you really-?"

"Yeah. Now give me back my shades so I can catch some Zs, ok?"

What Dave got was more than just his shades. What he ended up with was a troll all but throwing himself onto his prone form, awkwardly hugging him with one arm while the other kept his upper body raised enough to prevent any horn-to-head collisions. Tavros was stuttering so fast and often that it all sounded like a garbled mess of syllables, but it was easy to tell that he was pretty damn happy. Dave froze under the sudden assault of affection, unable to think of anything to do other than lay there waiting for Tavros to get a hold of himself. His cool kid ways had abandoned him and left him to lay bewildered and unsure of what to do.

They were going to have to have a talk about all these emotional outbursts, and how that was not how one rolled in the Strider household. But for the time being, Dave just laid there and let Tavros have his moment. It would take time to teach the troll what was expected of him as an honorary Strider housemate, after all.

And, really, Dave supposed that it would not be all that bad if he never did really come close to Strider levels of cool.

* * *

><p>"Dave?"<p>

"Mm… make it fast so I can actually sleep, alright?"

"Uh, ok. Just to clarify, is this like, uh, normal human friendship, or are we bromantic partners now?"

"Jesus Christ, Tavros, just – stop with the labels and just go with it, ok?"

"But, uh, labels are important to figure out what we are, right?"

"Tavros?"

"Yes?"

"I made up the bromantic partners thing, so just shut the fuck up and go to sleep before I take back your title."

"Oh. Uh, ok."

"Yeah."

"Uhh, so just friends then."

"I am going to punch you in the dick."

"Whoa. Uh, Dave, I'm not really comfortable with these allusions to black feelings—"

"Tavros?"

"Uhh, yeah?"

"Just shut up."

"Ok. Uh, good night?"

"Whatever."


	4. Chapter 4

Quick author's note: Apologizes for not having clear indications of where different sections separated. I forgot that ff doesn't leave in my extra spaces. Previous chapters have been fixed with separations and I will try to remember to add them before publishing in the future

* * *

><p>As it turned out, sleeping inside the bubble was not as crazy an experiment as Dave had vaguely hoped. It was not a trip to a dream self, or an encounter with frightening beasts of the universe. There was no travelling at all.<p>

When he fell asleep, he ended up on memory lane.

Dreams were just memories. Not even the important ones really. They could be ones that had been long forgotten because there was no point in remembering them. Sitting at the breakfast table at the age of six eating Fruit Loops; pushing the grocery cart when Bro dragged him along to shop with him; an average day at school listening to the average boring lecture.

Everything that had ever occurred could be reached in sleep. This could have been useful if Dave could choose what memories he watched, but that simply was not how it worked. They came randomly, like dreams, only the content happened to be his life.

For now though, his mind seemed to be working through his earlier years. There was not a single flash to Sburb.

When Dave woke up after a simple memory of turning on his fan because it was hot, he sighed and shrugged. It should not have surprised him that sleeping would be so tame as to just be a skip through the memory fields considering they were in a memory bubble.

What he did find interesting though was that it was definitely warmer than it had been when he went to sleep. In fact, Dave was sweating under his blanket and shoved it off in disgust. Why was it suddenly hot like—

Dave groaned.

It was hot like it was in his last memory of the middle of summer. Of _course_ this bubble would change according to his memory dreams. Of course it would choose the last dream to be during the hottest damn season.

And of course, Dave was pretty damn sure that he was not going to be able to sleep again for a while. The boy was not the least bit tired and now he was too hot and needed a shower.

Dave was trapped in this memoryscape until the next time he could get himself to sleep.

"Fuck."

There was a grumble from down on the floor, and it was then that Dave realized that he had the whole bed to himself. The boy sat up and looked over to find Tavros sprawled out on the ground and looking generally uncomfortably hot. His pajama bottoms were rolled up as well as his sleeves, and his blanket had been left to lay in a pile off to the side.

And he was definitely awake.

"The weather better down there?"

"Uhh, no, not really," Tavros grumbled. "I uh, thought maybe if I wasn't so close to you, but no. It's still really, uh, fucking hot."

Dave nodded in understanding before swinging his legs over the side of the bed and getting up. Normally he would laze around in bed for a while, but when it was warm like this it was better to get up and get shit done. First the windows were shoved open as far as they could go followed by him cranking up the fan as high as it could go.

"Does it, uh, usually get this hot on Earth?"

"Depends on where you are and when," Dave said with a shrug. He moved to his dresser to pick out a new t-shirt and put it on after he tugged his sweat-soaked one off. "Doesn't it get hot on the planet of the trolls?"

"Alternia."

"Whatever."

"Not, uh, not quite like this, at least where I lived," Tavros explained. "This really, really sucks." He was sitting up now and eyeing the fan. Before he could make another move though, Dave tossed a tank top at him which gracefully draped itself over the troll's horns.

"Change into that. Your shirt looks like it's gonna boil you alive."

Tavros picked up the tank that was, frankly, more of an undershirt than anything. But Dave figured that since they did not even have underwear, an undershirt would be beyond the troll's understanding. The tank top was held up and inspected with curiosity.

"It's not black." It seemed like a particularly odd comment, but then Dave noted that black seemed to be the theme of Tavros' clothing. Maybe trolls just wore black.

"Only dumbasses wear black in the summer."

"Oh." With that, Tavros put it down and started to pull his shirt off. Dave could not help glancing over, curious to see just how the troll managed to take off the shirt with those huge ass horns in the way. It turned out that the shirt material was stretchier than it appeared and easily stretched enough to get one horn through and then the other.

Putting the tank top on seemed to be more difficult since the earth cotton did not have the elasticity that Tavros was used to. The shoulders snagged on his horns and with his arms already up into the arm holes, it was hard to tug it up enough to fix the problem. When Dave could not stand to watch anymore of the pathetic display, he told Tavros to stop moving and let him do it.

It was not surprising that Tavros was grey all over, but it was still weird to look at. On top of that, the troll did not have nipples or a belly button. His torso was pretty much just skin covering muscle and bone.

Kind of weird, if Dave were to be honest.

But the tank top was eventually on and Tavros was left to change into some shorts while Dave left to cool down the apartment. There were several fans around, and luckily the memory was one from when they had an air-conditioning system that kind of worked. It did not go any higher than medium, but it was something at least. After a couple of tries, Dave got it running again.

A shiver ran down his back that had nothing to do with air-conditioning. It was deeper and more invasive feeling than that. Before Dave could consider why, there was a couple yelps from his bedroom. One of them most certainly did _not_ belong to Tavros.

Aradia was shuffling out of the bedroom, looking flustered but also amused. Behind her was Tavros who was finishing buttoning his fly, his face a deep, burning mahogany.

Dave could not help a smirk.

"Welcome back to the Strider bubble. Hope you're enjoying the trip so far. I hear the view on the way in is nice," he greeted. The female troll rolled her eyes, but there was definitely amusement on her face. Tavros on the other hand squawked.

"Dave! That's, uh, seriously uncalled for!"

"Well, I don't think that Aradia asked to check out your troll dick either, so we'll call it even."

"To be fair, I did drop in unexpected," Aradia pointed out to the boy, obviously trying to mediate a bit. Dave shrugged.

"He should have been careful where he let it all hang out. I mean, unless you didn't mind. For all I know, it really was a nice view-"

Tavros stammered out, "Seriously, stop!" as he moved to clamp his hand over Dave's mouth. The boy was faster, grabbing his wrist, but when it came to strength, the troll was harder to fight off. The two struggled against each other until Aradia finally shoved them apart.

"Alright, enough! I didn't come to watch you two argue like a newly announced blackrom," Aradia stated with a smile. Tavros attempted to explain to her with an ever increasing number of stutters that that was not what their relationship was, but that they were like friends, but not bromantic partners since those did not really exist.

Dave just crossed his arms and asked, "Then what did you come for?"

"Was in the neighborhood and thought I'd see how you were settling into things here!"

"Cool. Once I get some pants on, I'm going to have some questions for you."

* * *

><p>"Tavros."<p>

"Yes?"

"What did Dave mean? Wasn't he already wearing pants?"

"Uh, well, I guess that humans wear these things called underwears. It's like, a layer of clothing under their clothing, I think."

"That's pretty silly."

"Yeah, that's what I said. But uh, he seemed pretty convinced that it was weird that we don't."

"Hm. Well, the more I know now. And Tavros?"

"Yeah?"

"It wasn't such a bad view."

"Uhhhhh, oh, wow, um. Wow. I don't, uh, know what to say."

"You're welcome!"

* * *

><p>Dave went straight for the important questions. Now that he was a bit more settled, it was time to figure out what the hell this whole living in a bubble thing was going to be like.<p>

"When we sleep, all it is is a stroll down memory lane, right?

"Pretty much. Except that since this is a dream bubble, it is affected by your memory dreams. This apartment itself will stay more or less the same as it was in your last memory of it, but the wider environment will change with your memories. But since this is your bubble, only your memories will make a difference. Tavros' won't change anything as long as he's not in his own bubble."

"So that's why the weather changed."

"Yup!"

"Are we going to age at all? Or are we stuck in these kid bodies for eternity?"

"Mm, that's kind of a tricky question. You have some control over it, but you only get that control with time. If you think that you're supposed to be getting older, then you will. But you have to genuinely think you should be older, not just wishing or imagining you are. So you have to know that time has passed."

"So I have to wait for a while before I can think I'm supposed to be that much older?"

"Yes."

"Alright."

"Uhh, but does that mean that we'll eventually be really old?"

"Not if you stop thinking about your age. If mentally you don't feel you're any older than you are physically, you will cease to grow."

"Cool. Now, when you came into the bubble-"

"Let me guess. You felt a creepy, invasive sort of feeling?"

"Yeah."

"That would be because I came into your bubble! You'll get the same feeling when other bubbles run into yours, only a lot stronger."

"But it won't bother me after a while?"

"Not once you see who it is, or at least that's how I understand it. I've heard though that sometimes it doesn't go away if you don't want the person in your bubble."

"Uh, so, I don't think that I've ever felt anything, you know, like that."

"Because this is Dave's bubble, not yours."

"Oh. Right."

Soon thereafter, Aradia announced she was just making a quick visit – that she had to go elsewhere already – and bid the two goodbye before disappearing again. No doubt she was getting things done for the greater good of reality.

Dave and Tavros on the other hand did what selfish, not saving the world things they needed to do. Tavros went to go sit by the newly-discovered air-conditioner while Dave went to take off his pants again as he saw nothing wrong with the male troll seeing him in his underwear. It was too damn hot for decency amongst friends.

Perhaps it was easier to give up on reality than Dave had originally thought. There was a whole new world out here, and as dull as it was in comparison to offing enemies and rigging stock markets, it was new and it was his.

This was not alpha Dave's bubble.

This was motherfucking dead Dave's bubble.

This belonged to him.


	5. Chapter 5

Author's note:

My apologies that I haven't been updating on this site much. The truth is that I'm uploading this fic on two other sites that are much easier for me to use, and I tend to forget I have it here. I would highly recommend you follow this fic at one of those other places. Obviously replace (dot) with actual dots. They are:

Tumblr: brodad(dot)tumblr(dot)com

This is where the story is originally posted and where all parts that have been written are posted. Even if you do not have a tumblr, it is not too difficult. There is a master list you can find under the icon that has all the current parts.

archiveofourown(dot)org/works/199146/chapters/294725

This is the second place where I am posting it. It is only about halfway through what has been posted, but I am editing it as I post it, so it is a cleaner version than what can be found on tumblr, and it has more parts than have been posted here.

If for some reason you really do not wish to read it anywhere but here, let me know and I will try to be more active here.

* * *

><p>"Let's, uh, do this."<p>

"No."

"Uh, are you sure you don't, you know, what to?"

"Yeah."

"But it would be so sick!"

"No it wouldn't, because you suck. Can't even keep a rhythm."

"Uhhh, that's a lie. I can too, sometimes."

"No."

"You're just, uh, afraid I'll totally crush you under my, you know, totally ill onslaught."

"Really?"

"Yeah. So, uh, does that statement, you know, make you want to now?"

"Let me think about that – no."

"Uh, you didn't really think about it, did you?"

"Nope."

"Fine. I'm still going to, uh, go and get down with my bad, er, troll self."

Dave finally tore his eyes away from the television to give Tavros a harsh stare. The shades did nothing to muffle the stern tone this stare was taking. "Touch my turn tables and I will end you."

In response, Tavros grinned a mischievous grin that was decidedly not a good sign for Dave. He took a step backwards towards the boy's room. "I, uh, think I have your goat now. So you should, you know, consider giving in."

The game controller was set to one side, but Dave still did not get up. "I'm saying this for your sake, my man. Better think this through before you take my lavish lady hostage. I will throw so many bodacious beats at you that you will come out of this with a crazy concussion."

"Uhh, well, I think you should, if you want to that is, _bring it_."

"It's already been brought."

* * *

><p>The statement that the invasive feeling would be stronger when it was a bubble colliding with Dave's and not just a single troll fairy was definitely a contestant for biggest understatement of the year. Dave had been kicking Tavros' ass in a rap off when the sensation hit him. It twisted his gut and he physically shuddered with the jolt that raced up his spine. His hand slipped and the vinyl screeched.<p>

"Dave?" Tavros asked worriedly, wincing at the horridly high pitched assault on his ears. The boy ripped his hand from the turn table and started to rub at his arms. The goose bumps were not helping.

"Just what I needed."

"Uhh, what?"

Dave ignored the questioning look and instead moved to his window. Maybe he would be able to see a difference outside.

The fact that his apartment building, the street below him, and a few cars now stood on a cliff covered with green grass as far as the eye could see with a few dark buildings here and there implied that yeah, his bubble was getting extremely acquainted with another bubble. It was like the bubbles had already helped themselves to some weird bubble sex and produced a grotesque baby bubble that was a mix of their various components.

Tavros was glancing over his shoulder when suddenly he exclaimed, "Whoa! Uh, whoa, that's my house!"

"This is your bubble?"

"Yeah! That's uh, that's my house and that's where I practiced jousting and uh, well, that's where I, er, fell off the cliff, but that's not such a nice thing to remember, so anyway," Tavros stammered, smiling despite the look that Dave was giving him. "Do you uh, want to visit? I can show you around, if you want, uh."

Dave sighed and looked completely unimpressed, but not once did he resist going down. It looked nice enough and how often was it that anyone got to see an alien planet, even if it was just the memory of it?

Not often.

* * *

><p>"Your house looks like an architect suffering from Montezuma's revenge took a huge shit."<p>

Tavros looked a bit hurt by the comment, but he tried to brush it off. "We make our houses when, uh, we're just little grubs. I think it looks pretty cool considering I was so little and, uh, had just survived the first tests."

"Tests?" Dave asked as the troll led him into the house. Tavros nodded.

"After we hatch. We go through, uh, tests to see if we're, maybe, worthwhile."

"Intense. What do they do with the trolls that don't pass it? Send them to retarded grub school?"

The troll shifted awkward before mumbling, "Uhhh, no, actually, cause grubs win by, um, surviving, so if they don't pass, then there's really not much they can do since, uh, you know. They're kind of dead." The last part was rushed and so quiet it was hard to catch.

The silence was palpable as Dave stopped walking and just stared at Tavros. He wanted to believe that it was the worse joke ever told, but the look on the troll's face said otherwise. Dave grimaced.

"Dude, prepare yourself, because I'm about to give a huge 'fuck you' to cultural sensitivity. That's seriously fucked up."

Tavros shrugged weakly. "Uh, well, I dunno. That's just how it's always been."

"Then it's always been seriously fucked up," Dave insisted. "You don't just off babies. I mean, offing anyone after they're a baby is already pretty bad, but fuck, babies? That's fucked up. Period."

"Does it, uh, make it maybe better if I said that trolls are culled way after they are grubs too?"

Dave raised a hand to his head and pressed his palm again his temple. "No. No it doesn't. But it explains why you're all fucking nutjobs. Who wouldn't be when they could get killed at any moment for no better reason than just because."

"Uhhh, it's to make sure as a species we're-"

"Tavros."

"Yeah?"

"Just stop. It's fucked up. Period. End of story. Thank your lucky stars and prostrate yourself before the nearest deity thanking him for his mercy for getting you out of that steaming pile of fucked up."

Tavros looked at him for a moment before, slowly, smiling, saying, "Well, uh, it is nice to know that I'm not going to, you know, be culled in a couple years."

Dave, for one moment, considered smiling back even if it was completely forced and letting it go. But no. Cultural sensitivity had already receiving the biggest 'fuck you,' but it was going to have to deal with a nice, heaping serving of 'fuck you' on the side.

So the boy walked up to the troll and held out his hand. It took a while, but eventually Tavros figured it out and reached out to take it. Dave pulled him and proceeded to give him the best intergalactic bro hug any reality has ever seen. It reeked of cool but deep bro support. It was the sort of hug that would have full grown cool bros weeping. Bro would have been the most proud. Hell, even Bro might not have been able to hold all the cool.

But, of course, Tavros did not appreciate the sheer coolness of the bro hug. He did not even give Dave a good pat on the back. Dave was merciful and did not point out how terrible Tavros was at bro hugging. It seemed the only brand of hug the troll could handle was of the hyperactive puppy variety.

"Uhh, Dave?"

"Shh. Only the healing power of the bro hug now."

"What?"

"Shut up and just accept my gesture of 'shit sorry your society sucked monkey balls, but you're totally chill here, even if you're socially retarded,' alright?"

"What?"

Dave rolled his eyes, even though Tavros would not be able to see it through his shades. He pulled out of the bro hug just enough to place his hands on the troll's shoulders and let his shades slid down his nose so that he would look over them. Glossy pink met glossy white.

"The fact that you would have been offed is sick in the worse way because there's nothing wrong with you, even if you were still a cripple, and even though you're still a total loser with the social skills of a-"

He did not get any further than that as Tavros scrambled to place his hand in Dave's again and pull him into the most awkward intergalactic bro hug any reality had ever seen. The only tears would have been out of sheer hilarity it would have provided anyone who had even an ounce of coolness. It would have made Bro die twice over from laughter.

The whap Tavros gave Dave's back nearly knocked the wind out of him.

"Uh, Dave, I uh, thanks."

"It's not problem, man. Just being a decent human being."

"Then thanks for, not really by choice but uh, still, being human, I guess."

"Are those fucking tears I feel on my shoulder?"

"Uhhhhhhhh, no. That would be, uh, really awkward, and I wouldn't. Cry that is."

"Right. Just let me know when you're done accepting the gift of humanity. Or when you take pity on me and how I am suffering through how not cool this is just for you."

This statement only made the matter worse. Dave could not escape since Tavros had tilted his head to avoid slamming his horn into the boy's face, but as such wedged Dave between the troll's body and his other monster horn. He was trapped in the worse intergalactic bro hug in the history of every reality.

It was worth the universe of 'fuck you' that he was sending towards cultural sensitivity though.

Though maybe not the coppery stains on his shirt that Tavros refused to admit were tears.

"Just man up to it. You had a bitch moment."

"I did not cry."

"The stains of shame on my shoulder say otherwise."

"I, uh, got something in my eye."

"Yeah. It's called big ol' tears of self-esteem issues."

"Uhhh, it's time for you to shut up now, if that's ok."

Luckily for the troll, they arrived at his room at that moment, and Dave found something of more interest to him than a couple stains on his shirt.

"…Is that a poster of a troll Peter Pan?"

* * *

><p>"That's a bed?"<p>

"Recuperacoon."

"Bless you."

"What?"

"You sleep in that thing?"

"Uhh, well, I don't sleep well since my horns don't, you know, fit. But yeah."

"That's just fucked up, man."

"What? Why?"

"Look at it. It's like you took a huge ass warm, sliced its head off, and then went on to sleep in its innards. Christ."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"But that's, uh, what we all sleep in, so, it doesn't seem weird to me?"

"We're not taking one back to the apartment, so say goodbye to your decapitated bed monster."

"Uhh, but it's really not so bad! You should try, if you want."

"No."

"Come on, I'll uh, help you in."

"Dude, let go of me right now, or so help me-"

When Dave shoved Tavros away, he did it with enough force that for a moment, the troll was put off-balance. He accidently overcompensated and whacked the boy in the face with a horn, which caused Dave to lose his balance and step back to keep from falling.

His foot landed in spoor slime which did not offer him the least bit of leverage. All that kept Dave from falling backwards with one leg hooked into the recuperacoon was Tavros grabbing him and managing to steady him.

However, it was too late to salvage his sock, shoe, and his pant leg from mid-shin downward. It was soiled with green goop.

"It's official," Dave said flatly as he placed his foot back on solid ground with a loud squelch. "I hate troll shit."

* * *

><p>"I'm not even going to say anything about this jousting shit."<p>

"Because it's so, uh, cool?"

"That was not the word that came to mind."

The two spent a long while going through Tavros' house with Dave asking – often condescendingly – what things were and Tavros happily explaining. The boy had gotten himself caught up in a few of the troll's games, all of which made him feel as if he was drowning in nerdiness. However, he was merciful enough to allow Tavros to bring a couple back to the apartment.

It definitely had nothing to do with the fact that Dave had lost them all and refused to allow anything to exist that Tavros was better at than him. He was also definitely not already planning out how to win next time.

Dave did not make a fuss when they then went on to spend hours out on the troll fields. Tavros was practically galloping around, feeling the grass and mud between his toes and obviously loving it. Dave settled for laying out on the grass and just chilling. He and Bro had not done a whole lot of travelling, so there were very few times that Dave have ever been in a place that was so green and mild soft.

The irony that he found Tavros' home to be any of those things when it was on the shitty troll planet was not lost on Dave. There had to be something good about the troll shit, he supposed.

It was a nice break from the harsh skyscrapers and rough concrete and unyielding heat.

But when Tavros asked, Dave did not say any of that. The boy simply shrugged and said it was alright.

Tavros knew what he meant though. The troll smiled and flopped down next to him, rattling off about all his animal friends that used to be around – "What are you, Troll Snow White?" – and they just let time pass by as they laid around in the grass.

Dave realized they were like a couple of dumbass kids. Who lays around in the grass talking about animals and the clouds and whether that one looked like a cat or a lusus or a crow that got way too excited and tasted the sharp end of a shitty sword by accident?

And then Dave remembered that he was kind of still a kid.

"Huh."

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Oh. Uh, ok. I just thought that, since you said something-"

"Nope. Go back to telling me all about your furry little friends."

"But most of them didn't really, uh, have fur."

"Whatever."


	6. Chapter 6

Author's note: Hey guys, sorry that took forever. Had finals, then vacation, and I forgot that I need to catch you all up. So I'm posting three chapters tonight and in a couple days will post a few more until you're caught up with Archive.

Also, you're now getting edited chapters, so there is a shift in things like how many uhs Tavros uses, and just general betterness. But anyway. Yeah. Hope you enjoy.

* * *

><p>The chance to show off his home triggered in Tavros an unprecedented interest Dave's life that he had had in his apartment before they had died. Dave tried to put that bad habit to rest, but the questions never seemed to come to an end. Every cutting remark and vague answer and general ignoring of the question did not get the boy anywhere.<p>

Over the next week – or was it just days, or a month, neither of them really knew, time was as hard to keep track of as a squirrelly, greased ferret – Tavros would ask just little things since all his bigger question were flat out denied or ignored.

"What's that on that poster?"

"Why, uh, is that little wooden human thing on the strings? And why in the hallway? It's kind of really unpleasant to look at."

"Uhhh, what's this jar of yellow liquid in your closet?"

It was not even worth asking how he found some of the things to ask about. Dave preferred to not know about Tavros' snooping habits. It was good enough that the troll could actually go and do his own thing nowadays, and the boy did not dare forbid him from touching his stuff if it meant returning to Tavros needing to be in the same room as him all the time twenty-four/seven.

In general, it was not a big deal. Dave did not mind explaining the blender or his sweet websites or telling Tavros to drink the yellow liquid to see what it was.

What was a problem was when Tavros would ask about things that were Bro's.

Dave would shrug and change the topic. Eventually he would say that it was his Bro's, and Tavros would back off, as if it was a touchy subject. The boy was not sure if it really was a touchy subject but he did not correct the troll.

He tried his best to ignore the fact that just by avoiding talking about anything related to Bro, it was pretty obvious that it was, indeed, a touchy subject.

But Dave was certain that it was ok. It had shocked him, and it was hard to accept, and even now it felt like Bro could just pop out at any moment and prove that awful vision wrong. But Dave could move on, could live without his guardian. It was not like he was going to sit around crying over it. Shit happened. It was time to move on.

And yet there he was, trapped in an apartment that was more Bro's than it was his, and every time he was reminded of how these things belonged to the coolest dude that ever cooled, Dave felt gross. It was the only word he could think to use. His stomach would drop and there would be bile rising in his throat. He would feel wound up tight. He would feel frustration that he could not name.

Dave was always disappointed when Bro did not show up and grin that perfect smirk of smug superiority.

But it was ok. It was totally chill. Shit happened, and when it did, you moved on.

So Dave started to ignore things in the apartment. He ignored the plush puppets with their rumps all hanging out; he ignored the posters hung up everywhere; he eventually even stopped playing videogames, opting instead to mess around with his turn tables or go lay in the grass or do anything else really.

Tavros asked what was wrong, but Dave just replied it was nothing.

Dave was totally chill.

Until Tavros asked about the string hanging from the ceiling in the kitchen. Dave explained that it was a hatch that led to a crawlspace. The troll grinned and asked if they could go up. There was no reason not to, so Dave shrugged and reached up to pull the stairs down.

It figured that the apartment would be set up as he last remembered it before entering Sburb. It figured that up in that space there would be dozens of plush puppets ready to rain down on him. It figured that Bro's final prank would be laying in wait, ready to poke fun at him again even though this time, there was no Bro waiting on the roof for him to duel.

All this shit that Bro had left behind only served to remind Dave that he had been left behind too.

Dave did not realize what he was happening until there was already a sword in his hand and cotton flying everywhere. Even when his consciousness caught up, he did not stop. Tavros was saying something, but it was hard to hear anything over the pounding of blood in Dave's ears. Soon, all the puppets were sliced and diced, but the sudden outburst of rage had not dissipated. Everything needed to go. Every last thing that reminded Dave of Bro needed to be destroyed.

The boy could not handle the emotions that thinking about Bro brought up, did not even want to handle them. How dare these artifacts of the man's awesome life constantly force him to feel them?

The living room was next. All puppets had to go, either sliced apart or grabbed and thrown against the walls, particularly at posters that would soon be shredded. There was shouting, most of which seemed to be his own, but he did not know what was being said. It could have been anything. Nothing could really penetrate the overwhelming anger that emanated from his chest out to every fiber of his every limb. If there was something underneath that rage, in the words he was yelling, or behind his destruction of treasured belongings, he could not see it.

Dave saw Tavros though, felt his grip on his arm, noted the ways his lips moved and his brows furrowed and his glassy white eyes were wide open. He was shrugged off, pushed off, shoved away. Dave was definitely yelling, maybe at the troll, maybe at no one. This was pretty far from cool; this was as far from cool as could be; it was hot and painful and it nearly felt like he could not breathe around the tight furnace burning inside.

The troll did not leave though, or even attempt to grab him again. Instead, Tavros was pressing his fingers to his head and what the hell was he doing, it did not make sense, why was Dave not grabbing another puppet to throw—

There was a jolt.

A flash.

Comfort like a cool, damp towel to a feverish brow.

And then it was gone. Dave gasped and stood there, not quite sure what had happened. But whatever had passed, it took his rage with it. Across from him, Tavros was groaning as he held his head, his eyes squeezed tightly shut.

That was all Dave saw before the tears obscured his vision.

It seemed that hidden under all the rage were just tears. Sad, pathetic tears. Dave could not make them stop, could not hide them all behind his shades when they would drip down his cheeks and off his chin. He rubbed at his eyes furiously; he opened his mouth to give himself a stern talking to, but all the came out was the word 'Why?'

It occurred to Dave that he was losing it. Maybe he had already lost it. Maybe he had fooled himself into thinking he had had it to start with.

"Dave?" The boy blinked, trying to at least be able to see for two seconds. It did not work, but that was alright because Tavros moved to stand by him, his hand gingerly touching his shoulder. His hand shook some, though Dave did not know why the troll was shaking. "Dave, are you, uh, ok now?"

Yeah, he was fine, totally fine, just having a normal freak out like any normal human would but it was ok, he was fine now, did not even know why he was crying when he was totally alright—

"No."

It was becoming impossible to maintain any sort of dignity. Without his anger, all Dave was at that moment was a sad little boy crying sad little boy tears. Perhaps that was why when Tavros ever so carefully pulled him close, Dave let himself bury his face into the troll's shirt, muffling his already nearly silent noises with a hand clasped to his mouth. This shit was embarrassing enough without having anyone else hear the sobs bubbling up and out.

Tavros was still trembling, but he kept quiet and hugged Dave close.

Later he would calm down and leave the apartment for a few hours. When he would come back the apartment would be mostly cleaned up and Tavros would be curled up on the couch, sighing and rubbing his head. It would take maneuvering, but Dave would find a way to sit on the couch with the troll's head on his crossed legs, taking over the job of massaging his head as a small token of thanks. They would talk then.

Until then, Dave needed a moment to be a small, sad boy, and Tavros gave him that moment. And so he silently sobbed, finally mourning the loss of Bro.

* * *

><p>"You gonna make it?"<p>

"Uhh, yeah, I'll be fine, probably. Eventually."

"You sure? You look like your brain is trying to escape out the top of your skull."

"Yeah, it's just, uh, a lot is in there right now and it's going to probably take a while to work it all out. Really, I'll be fine."

"Alright."

"How about you?"

"I'd rather not."

"Oh." Tavros winced a bit, so Dave just dug his thumbs against his temples a little harder. It seemed to help. The troll sighed. His eyes were still shut – they had not opened for more than a few seconds since Dave had returned.

The boy stopped massaging long enough to take off his shades and slid them onto Tavros' face. "That help?"

"Uhh, wow, yeah. Thanks."

"No problem. Used to be grandma Susan had migraines all the time."

"A what? Who?"

"A really bad headache. Grandma Susan was an old lady who lived down the hall."

"Oh."

Tavros' hair was pretty course between his fingers, but where it was shaved close to his scalp it was fuzzy and kind of soft. It was an odd observation, but Dave was looking to notice anything that was not what he had been thinking about for the past few hours or how puffy his eyes felt.

"So what was that back there?"

"I think you were-"

"Whoa, no, I know what that was. I mean that shit you pulled. What did you do, get in my head or something?"

"Oh. That. Uhh," Tavros stalled for a moment, as if trying to figure out how to word it. "I didn't really, you know, know what to do so I thought I could try to, um, commune with you."

"Do what now?"

"Commune. It's like mentally merging or something? It's kind of hard to explain."

"So what, you drop into people's heads and slush around in their brains?"

"Well, I only really do it with animals, usually. They aren't as complicated as trolls so it's not hard to deal with what's in their heads? I can just, um, let my consciousness mix with theirs for a while, and then they trust me and are my friends afterwards. Because we sort of know each other pretty intimately, I guess. And if I need them to do something, I can, uh, commune with them again and tell them to do it, and they will because it's like in their head and, uh, yeah."

"I did not need to know you were intimate with animals."

"What, uh, wait, that's not what I meant."

"Sure. But anyway, you got up in my head?"

"Uhh, I tried. But trolls and humans are really complicated, so it's hard to maintain any kind of bond and it takes a lot of energy to manage even that. And well, you were kind of, you know, really especially complicated at that moment, so I only hit the surface before the bond snapped."

Dave quirked a brow at the troll, unsure of how to process this information. So Tavros was secretly some sort of psychic, but only with animals usually, but he tried to do it with Dave – probably because he was losing all his shit – and that must have been the flash. But after that all the rage was gone. That had been what was probably on the 'surface' of his mind, so where had it gone?

Unless—

"Holy shit. Wait. Tavros, did you commune with all my angry shit and then get kicked out while still mixed up with it?"

"Um." Tavros shifted awkwardly. "Kind of?"

"Kind of?"

"Uhh, I kind of, may have, um, grabbed it, mentally that is, and taken it away and into my own head?"

Dave gapped at the troll.

"You're telling me that this migraine is from all the Dave rage you've got on the brain?"

"It's, uh, better than it was before, but, probably, yeah," Tavros quietly admitted. It explained how shaky and pained the troll seemed to be after Dave's angry shitstorm. It had been hard for the boy to handle his own rage, so imagining someone else having to deal it pounding around his head was painful to contemplate.

"Sorry, man."

"No, don't, it's fine. I mean, I uh, I was the one who got inside your head, and, well…"

"Yeah?"

"It kind of helped you, so I don't really mind."

"Who says I needed help?"

"Dave, I was, uh, in your head for a second. I still have some of it swimming around in my head."

"Yeah, ok, fine. It was a dumb question."

Tavros shrugged and likely unconsciously nuzzled a bit against the hands rubbing his head. This was all kind of weird, Dave was not going to lie about that. But considering it was his fault that the troll was in pain, on top of everything the guy had done for him when he lost it, he could deal with this weirdness.

"Dave?"

"Hm?"

"Um, now can I ask how you are?"

Dave quietly contemplated that one. It was a minute or two before he finally said anything.

"Sure."

"Are you ok?"

"Nah. But I'm working on it. Thanks to you, if I'm gonna be honest."

Tavros' cheeks turned that coppery color as he started to stammer about how it was nothing really that he needed to be thanked for. Dave could not help poking his face. It was warm to the touch and getting warmer by the second.

"Uh, whoa, what are you doing?"

"Poking your face."

"But why?"

"Because."

"That's not, uh, an answer."

"Would it make you feel better if I said it was because I found your weirdly colored alien blush cute?" Dave could not help smirking at how the troll's face was flooded with blood until it was practically a burnt orange color. "Man, seriously, you're way too easy."

"Shut up," Tavros grumbled, turning his head so that his horn bumped against Dave's knee. "You're the one that's, uh, saying weird things."

"Says the guy that was trying to get intimate with my head."

The troll squirmed and attempted to sit up, stuttering out objections. But the blood rushed from his head and Tavros groaned in pain. Dave tugged him back down to rest his head.

The two grew silent, Tavros occasionally sighing as Dave continued to rub his scalp and massage his temples. Sometimes Dave would look around the cleaned apartment. There were far fewer puppets than before, but some were still in pristine condition and were all placed in the corner of the apartment. The posters had all been taken down and carefully rolled up, sitting next to the pile of puppets. Even from where he sat, he could see where tape had been used to repair the rips and tears. A few more puppets were actually laid out on the other end of the couch, but they were not unharmed. They were all torn in some way. But their sliced off limbs were laid next to where they were cut from, and a couple were already sewn back together.

The mental image of Tavros, his head pound from a Dave-rage-induced migraine, carefully putting away his Bro's things as if in storage for bringing out again later, and even going so far as to fix the ones that he could, as if they were still worth something, was almost more than the boy could handle. It showed just how much Tavros was thinking about him and how he would feel.

Because hours later, Dave was horrified that he could have potentially destroyed everything that remained of Bro.

Maybe the troll only knew how he felt because Tavros had taken a dip into his head, but Dave did not mind. The kindness was still enough to almost make him lose his cool again.

But enough tears had been shed to last Dave a lifetime – or an afterlifetime – so he opted to ruffle Tavros' hair and murmur a thank you.

Tavros smiled a bit awkwardly and replied it was nothing.

Dave insisted that it was pretty damn far from nothing.

Tavros finally gave in and said, "You're welcome."


	7. Chapter 7

"Whoa, sorry, I uh, I'll just go—Uhh, whoa."

The boy blinked back from where he was standing in the hall. It was not every day that Dave donned nothing but his shades and a towel wrapped around his hips as he left the shower, opened his bedroom door to find a troll going through his vinyl, and then have the troll stare at him with wide, glassy eyes.

In particular at his chest.

While Tavros had been for all of two seconds flustered and ready to leave, he seemed to have switched gears to something more akin to curiosity. Dave paused, glanced down at his own chest, and then looked back at the troll. Yeah, the guy was definitely checking out his chest. Dave checked once more, but there was nothing new and different about his chest from the last time he saw it. He looked up again.

"Are you done ogling my boyish physique, or should I pose for a little bit longer for you?"

That seemed to finally draw the troll back to reality. Tavros blinked and blushed and his eyes swiveled away, although Dave noted that they kept glancing back. "Uh, wow, sorry, I just have never seen anything like that."

"Look, I know I'm pretty much the most attractive being you or anyone else has ever seen, but you gotta control yourself," Dave stated as he finally entered the room.

The troll raised his hands and protested, "Whoa, no, that's not why I'm, uh, looking! I mean that I was, maybe, kind of a little bit, looking at those things on your chest."

"Things on my chest?"

"Yes. Those things. The, uh, the kinda pinkish-brownish things."

That was when everything slipped into place. Dave snorted and faced Tavros, lifting both hands to point at his chest. "Man, are you talking about my nipples?"

"Is that what they're called?"

"You were checking out my nipples?"

"I guess if that's what they're called?"

Dave would have laughed if that would not ruin all the fun he could have with this. So instead he just placed his hands on his hips and slipped his poker face back on, quirking his brow just so. "Ok, look, Tav, I'm gonna be upfront with you, from one bro to another. I know you didn't do it on purpose, but that's kind of super creepy."

"What? Really?" Tavros asked, yet again glancing down at them before flushing and looking back at Dave's face.

"Seriously. You don't just check out nipples. You know, unless you're interested in getting pretty intimate with this hot bod of mine, in which case we'd have to have a talk."

"Whoa, wow, I, uhh, those are sexual things?" The troll was all coppery-toned all across his face, his eyes wide and his expression horrified, embarrassed, and flustered. Tavros' gaze was glued to Dave's face, as if he feared if he was not careful, he would accidently look at something really inappropriate again.

Trolling Tavros was no doubt one of Dave's favorite activities in the bubble.

"Really sexual. I mean, jeez, I'm about to faint from how scandalized I am."

"But, uh, then why are you exposing them? You should cover them if they're so, you know, inappropriate."

"I might have if I'd known you'd eye them like an old man in a stripper joint."

"In a what?"

Dave sighed and shook his head. "Never mind. Just try to remember that my face is up here, ok? Not down here," he explained, making sure to indicate his chest with his hand. Just as expected, the movement brought Tavros' gaze back down again. Too easy. "Tavros, come on, what did I just say?"

"Uh, sorry," Tavros stammered, ripping his eyes away again. Dave had to admit, it was actually a little weird to have the troll so interested in his nipples, but it was not that odd that he would find them interesting. It was not like trolls had nipples. Maybe later the boy would tell him that nipples on guys were no big deal. For now though, it was more fun to yank his chain.

"Whoa, what's that then-"

"Don't even think about looking at my bellybutton. Creep."

"Wow, Dave, just please put on some clothes then. I don't want to accidently look at inappropriate things!"

"Maybe you should leave my room then. I can't really take off my towel when, for all I know, you'll gaze upon little Dave with that kind of look."

"No, what, I wouldn't do that!"

"But you were checking out my nipples."

"Because I didn't know and I've never seen those before and, uh, I'm just gonna, maybe, leave now."

"Sounds like a plan."

Once Tavros was out the door and it was shut behind him, Dave had to try his best to keep from laughing. Even when the troll was mortified, sheer curiosity got the better of him as he took one more peek before the door closed. There was no doubt in Dave's mind that this would not be the end of this line of trolling.

It was seriously too easy.

* * *

><p>Life in the dream bubble was slowly becoming more and more like home. Certainly, it had always been Dave's apartment, but the fact that it was in a bubble, that he was dead, that he shared it with a dead troll, and that the dead troll's bubble went and turned everything outside green made it pretty clear it was not like back on earth in reality. But Dave was getting comfortable. He was getting used to never knowing how much time passed, being up for days before realizing he should sleep, and conking out with Tavros laid out next to him.<p>

Despite his ability to not be at Dave's side all day every day, the troll never could quite handle being the only one awake in the bubble. And, really, if Dave were honest, he had to admit that when he was up before Tavros and moving around, it was kind of creepy. So the unwritten pact to just sleep at the same time stayed in place.

Dave had eventually gotten around to releasing the puppets from their prison in the corner, placing them around randomly in the room. The posters were hung up and the gaming system plugged in and ready to go. Tavros was smart enough not to ask if this meant he was over it.

They were even growing, if just a little bit. It helped that they had both been on the verge of massive growth and change. Typically they would find what had changed when they woke up to longer limbs or a couple stray hairs of pure masculinity growing here and there. It still was not much – Dave was pretty sure he had only reached fourteen at this point – but it was something, and assured them both that they would not be trapped as children for all of the lack of time they had in the middle of nowhere.

Aradia would still visit from time to time. She was always observant, silently judging but what, Dave did not know. Sometimes he would ask about how things were going in reality, but she was always very roundabout when it came to that topic, and was quick to change it. When Tavros would ask about the other trolls, she simply said he would find out eventually.

When she was not dodging questions though, she was always asking them and telling jokes and even exchanging amused verbal jabs with Dave. She got along with Tavros too, and they would talk about things that Dave could not decipher because of all the name of trolls he did not know and a whole vocabulary of troll shit that he did not bother to learn.

When they were not sleeping or chatting with Aradia, they were usually lazing around doing the sorts of things one would expect of boys with no responsibilities.

But eventually they were bound to get bored and make up something to do.

That was when Tavros suggested that they should create some music on Dave's turntables together. The boy questioned the we part, but somehow he still ended up in his room, explaining all the different parts to Tavros. It took some time to teach the troll how to work the machine and how to change the sounds to just what one wanted. Eventually Tavros had a handle for all the ways to alter and twist the sound, but he was still pretty awful at actually spinning discs. After his nails scratched a vinyl beyond repair, Dave took him off disc duty.

From there they started to mess around with ideas for their creation. They picked out the beats, argued for nights on end about the sick rhymes to use, and tested out their ideas. Hours at a time would be spent spinning discs and turning knobs and rapping.

Ultimately, their ideas – perhaps because they were not just from Dave but were mixed with Tavros' wackier ideas – were far too grand for just Dave's turntable. They spent time trying to compensate, and then considered cutting some things, but they simply could not let go of what they wanted.

It took a lot of thinking and silent struggles with his emotions, but in the end Dave was able to suggest they use Bro's. It was not being used by anyone else anyway. However, it was another week or so before he actually touched the thing itself. Tavros waited until then to do so himself, likely waiting for that sign that it was actually ok.

It took a couple hours to figure out everything on Bro's turntables. It was definitely better quality than Dave's, but it was also that much more complicated. It was Tavros who finally got a hang of all the levers and buttons, so it was decided that he could deal with those while Dave took care of the actual discs and of course the rap that they had perfected.

It took several practice sessions and a few arguments, but eventually they had it perfected.

The next time that Aradia showed up, Tavros was practically jumping up and down with his excitement to have someone listen to their collaboration. It would be a mistake to think that Dave was not excited as well, but he made certain that it at least looked like he was apathetic about the whole thing.

It did not work though. After he and Tavros were done and Aradia had clapped and complimented their work, she was sure to specifically mention how happy the two looked when they were playing together.

There was a slightly mischievous hint to her smile that Dave decided to ignore. He already treated all her comments that alluded to any sort of relationship between him and Tavros that could involve bumping uglies as he would his own – ironically low-brow jokes. It was easy for him to go along with it for the laughs. Dave suspected there may be more behind her comments than behind his, but it was all shrugged off. Aradia was welcome to get off to whatever interspecial fantasies she wanted. If there was something that his more traumatic childhood moments had taught Dave, it was to not judge anyone's fantasies because hey, at least they were not getting off to puppets.

Dave suspected though that Tavros was not as capable of letting such comments slide off his back. Most of the time he missed them altogether, and when he did get them he would stammer and flush and really just make it that much easier for Aradia. The boy usually chose to let Tavros deal with the messes he got himself into himself; the troll needed to learn to let that shit go.

But, there were special occasions. When a Strider was not letting shit go, he jumping right in and adding to it. Eventually the pile of shit would be so huge that no one could possibly even consider it to be anything but shit. Plus it was always a good time. So on occasions, when he was in the mood, Dave would drape himself over Tavros' shoulders and start talking about the wedding they were planning and how really, the huge ass horns made such useful handholds when things got hot and heavy.

Tavros did not understand the concept of adding to the shit pile. Usually he would stutter and flail his arms uselessly before shoving Dave off, excusing himself, and making objections to Dave's lies every step of the way. Aradia would give Dave a look and Dave would just shrug.

"You're going to give him a bloodpusher attack some day."

"You mean heart?"

"If you want to sound like a high-blood."

"Hugs not drugs."

"What?"

"Look, he'll be fine. Little dweeb just needs to learn to take a joke."

Aradia gave him an odd look before smiling. "Hmm, that's true. But you may need to learn a little something too."

"If it involves realizing some hankering for troll dick, you probably need to remember that this isn't one of your late night fantasies."

"Bone-bulge."

"What?"

"It's called a bone-bulge," Aradia stated, innocently clasping her hands behind her back. "And who's to say whether or not anything you learn has to do with his. All I'm suggesting is that you may realize that not everything is a joke."

Dave stared at her for a moment before saying simply, "Sorry, you lost me at bone-bulge, and how now I have to rewrite all my scandalous raps."

Aradia rolled her eyes.

"Oh, I'm sure it's that and has nothing to do with not wanting to consider a world beyond your sarcasm and irony."

"Glad we're on the same page again."

"Someday you'll realize that I'm right though."

"I'll be sure to have my 'Ask me about my trollfriend's bone-bulge in my ass' t-shirt ready to go."

Aradia had the decency to blush just a bit before snorting and smacking Dave on the shoulder. Soon enough she was off again and the boy was left contemplating what font would be best for such a shirt.

Ironically, of course.

* * *

><p>"Tav."<p>

"Yeah?"

"What the fuck is this shit?"

"Uh, that's a controller."

"Yeah. And what's all this shit here?"

"Plastic?"

"And what is all this fucking shit in the plastic?"

"Uhh."

"Scratches. There are scratches everywhere on this controller. I'm surprised you haven't accidentally sliced it open yet."

"I don't mean to, really. I just am not as careful when I get excited?"

"Whatever. Sit your ass down while I go get some shit. This problem is coming to an end today."

"What? Dave? Hey, uh, where are you going?"

"Patience, dude. You need to get some of that."

"Like you're one to talk."

"Can't hear your shitty attempts at insults while I'm in the bathroom."

"What? But you replied so you must be able to-"

"Nope. Can't hear a thing."

"You're a liar. But, uh, oh hey now you're out so I can—whoa, what are those?"

"Tavros, I'm about to introduce you to your new best friends. This is MC Clipper and his backup, Snoop File. With these bad boys, you'll be the slickest troll around."

"What?"

"Look, this is weird to do for another dude, so I'm only going to do it for you once, alright? Consider it my human kindness at work as I teach you basic hygiene. I'll even be totally authentic and talk about you in Asian so that you can't understand my insults while I do it."

"Uhh?"

"But after this, it's all you, big guy. You have to take care of your own shit."

"What?"

"Now give me your hand."

"_What_?"

"Give me your hand so we can hack off those god awful claws of yours until they are blunt nubs that won't fuck up my shit."

"Uhhh, no, I really don't think this is a really good idea, Dave, wait!"

"Tavros, you will take this like a goddamn man and just sit in one place—fuck, watch the horns!"

"Sorry, but this is really weird, why would you cut my nails—whoa, _whoa_, uh, please get off of me, oh gog-"

* * *

><p>It was a pair of clippers and two files later – not to mention countless bruises from Tavros' struggling – but Dave had managed to make the troll's claws blunt enough that they could not do any harm, even if Tavros wanted to.<p>

Dave cussed out his clippers. Things just were not made for troll nails. It was going to have to be files from here on out, which was embarrassing.

Tavros moaned about how he felt like a grub again without his claws.

Sacrifices had to be made sometimes.


	8. Chapter 8

Dave realized that he should have never told Tavros about the thousands of pirated movies he had. He should have never offhandedly mentioned that Pupa was a pretty shitty imitation of Peter. And never, ever should he have mentioned that Bro had downloaded practically every Peter Pan movie in existence out of pure ironic genius. A grown cool dude downloading movies about some little boy running around in a green dress and being a fucking asshole? The levels of irony were unending.

Just because downloading them was genius did not mean it was at all ironically entertaining to actually watch the things.

Of course, Tavros was loving them with every fiber of his unironic being.

"Oh wow, this is so awesome!"

"Uhh, he still looks funny without horns, but whoa. This one is even better than the last one!"

"I'm so not crying, these are not tears. Something in my eye, maybe."

Dave was ready to shoot himself in the face.

So, finally, he scooted up from where he had been slouching and braced his hand on the back of the couch, ready to jump over and make his escape. "Hey, look, you have a good time with your fanboy bone bulge or whatever. I'm gonna find something that doesn't make me want to stab myself in the eye."

"Whoa, I don't, that's awkward, but wait, but it's the best part!"

"So turned on you can't even think straight. I'll leave you two alone."

"But, no, uh, that's not—oh man look, he's flying!"

Dave rolled his eyes behind the safety of his shades and catapulted himself over the back of the couch to land feet first on the floor. He was considering going and seeing if there were any frozen pizzas in this particular memory environment. He definitely had the munchies.

He did not make it far though before he found himself face to face with dead eyes that could put Tavros' to shame. And the dude was not even dead. Not really anyway. It was hard to die when you were a puppet.

There, on the shelf in front of him, sat Lil Cal.

It did not make any sense. Never, not once in the time that he had been dead had Dave seen Lil Cal in his dream bubble. He did not know why his brain left the dude out, but it always had. This could not be his memory at work. But then what was Lil Cal doing there?

It had to be his brain. Had to be his memory. There was no other way.

But when had Cal gotten there? He was definitely not there earlier.

"Hey, Tav, can you stop fapping for a second?"

"What, whoa, I'm not-"

"Look, whatever, your dick aside," Dave said, turning to grab the troll by the horn and tugging it. "I just need you to tell me if you noticed him being here since we got up."

Tavros flailed and tried to slap away the boy's hand. "Please let go. And uh, what him? Is someone else here?"

"Yeah. Over there."

"Uhh, where?"

"There. Lil Cal is right-" Dave stopped himself as he turned to find the puppet gone. He blinked, rubbed his eyes, and even removed his shades for a moment. But no, the puppet was very much so not there anymore.

But Tavros was now staring at him in confusion. "Dave? Um, are you ok?"

"Yeah. Fine. Lil Cal must be messing with me or something."

"Who?"

"Lil Cal. He's Bro's main man."

"But there's no one else here except us? Aradia isn't even here, probably."

Dave looked at the shelf one last time before rubbing at his temple, muttering, "Yeah, fuck, you're right. Must be seeing things. Weird. I'd never seen him here before."

"Were you maybe, you know, thinking about Bro and maybe you were just thinking too much?"

"Just because a dude is grieving doesn't mean he has hallucinations," Dave replied, making sure his shades were on just right. He finally let go of Tavros' horn. "Anyway, now that I got all my crazy out, I'm just gonna go find some frozen pizza – oh hell no."

Tavros turned his head to look where Dave was staring, and promptly screamed. Dave would have teased him, but he had figured out early in life that most people found puppets moving around to be creepy shit. And that was just what the two were faced with as there, perched on the TV, was Lil Cal.

At least now Dave knew he was not the only one that could see him.

"Oh gog, what is that?"

"Tav, this is Lil Cal. Lil Cal, this here is Tavros. He's kind of a pansy."

"_Dave why is there, uh, a puppet sitting on your TV right now he was definitely not ever there before oh gog why?_"

The boy considered the puppet seriously. The little guy's eyes never revealed anything, and they sure as hell were not now. Maybe if he went over and gave him a fist bump—

Just like that, the puppet was gone again.

Tavros shrieked.

"Dude. Chill."

"Uh, Dave?"

"Yeah."

"I don't know if you knew this, but that thing probably should not move on its own, so this is really scary. Is this a normal thing for you?"

Dave shrugged, hoping that Tavros would not notice the goosebumps all along his arms. "Welcome to my life. In the afterlife."

"But that was never here before."

"Nah. Lil Cal never showed up in my bubble. I guess because my memories treated him like a person?"

"No offense but, uhh, your life was weird if that is considered a person."

"Dude, watch out. Don't insult the guy. He's a cool dude, even if he is kind of sketchy."

"But he's a puppet and – _oh gog why get it off get it off!_" Tavros was flailing as the puppet plopped down right on his head, its arms looping around his horns and riding him like a goddamn bronco. There was no doubt that Dave would have truly appreciated the moment if it were not for the fact that he definitely felt a smooth, subtle gust of wind just before and just after Lil Cal appeared.

It could not be. There was no way.

Dave was not going to get his hopes up just because Lil Cal showed up. He was getting paranoid. He was getting desperate. There was no way, _no way_.

Just as Tavros nearly had the little guy in his hands, he was gone again. Dave did not wait to watch the troll curl up on himself and try to regain any sense of dignity he still had. He was on a mission, and it was to get to the bottom of the Lil Cal mystery.

Because he could not even consider letting himself believe it was _him_.

Once he found Lil Cal in his room. The next time was on Bro's turn table. Just as Dave thought he had lost track, Tavros peeked up over the back of the couch and pointed towards the kitchen.

And there sat Lil Cal, smiling smugly, ever pleased with his radical self.

In his lap was a note.

Dave glanced over at Tavros – for a troll that could rip apart a man with his bare hands if he wanted to, he was incredibly and pathetically afraid of a puppet – before making his way in and picking up the note. As expected, Lil Cal was gone as soon as the boy took his eyes off him to inspect the note.

'What's taking you so long?'

That was when the boy's heart started to take on a life of its own and made a mad dash against his ribs to escape. No. No, he should not even consider that outcome. It would only lead to heartbreak when it turned out to not be the truth. Hope was for masochists and Peter Pan, but not for Dave.

No matter how many times he told himself that, his body refused to listen. His fingers started to tremble.

"Dave? What's it say?"

"It's a joke. Has to be a joke. Fucking Aradia, I will kick that bitch's tits in-"

"Hey, uh, Dave?"

"What?"

"There's a note on your thermal hub."

Dave actually froze on the spot, staring at Tavros for a moment as that set in. No way. No fucking way.

But there it was, innocently held by a little smiley face magnet.

'Come on up.'

"Oh fuck," Dave breathed as his stomach twisted and his chest grew hot. It could be, it could actually be, somehow maybe he had made it here, had his own bubble, was floating around out there and the boy had just sat here assuming the worst—

It was so much at once that Dave found he could not move from the spot. "Tav?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm going upstairs."

The troll considered him carefully, seeming to be genuinely worried for his safety being alone in the apartment. No doubt for Tavros this whole thing was like a bad scary movie. Moving puppets, notes everywhere – if it was not something that the boy found oddly familiar and that brought on pangs of homesickness, he would possibly feel the same way.

But, ultimately Tavros climbed over the couch and rushed over to Dave's side like a man running on the frontline. Lil Cal did not show his face again and the troll was slowly relaxing thanks to that.

"Uhh, are you sure?"

"I'm actually sort of having an emotional crisis right now, so not really sure about anything, but I'm thinking that's the plan," Dave replied simply, even as his cheeks burned a little hotter. If he was going to have an emotional crisis, better to be upfront and cool about it when he had already lost it in front of Tavros before. Maybe this would work better.

The troll in question stared at him with ever widening eyes. If he was starting to catch on, he did not say anything. He likely did not want to jinx it.

Dave led the way out of the apartment and started up the stairs. He tried to keep his steps even and relaxed, but he was pretty sure they were marching up those stairs with how fast they were going and how not in a chill mood he felt. Each step was a notch up the emotional ladder. Was he actually going to be there? Was this just all a cruel joke his memories were playing on him? Was all his mourning for nothing, was all the rest of the mourning he had left to do no longer his problem, was this all going to make it worse when there was no one on the roof but Lil Cal—

When he reached the door, Dave froze. He could not help the way his emotions were gripping him from the inside out. The boy would not say he was afraid, but he wasn't unafraid either.

"Should I open it?"

"You're the best tool a bro could ask for."

"Uhh, I'll take that as a compliment."

And then the door was opened. The sun was too damn bright, but thankfully the glare was tempered by Dave's shades.

He held his breath.

"Oh fuck."

There he was. He was just standing there, arms crossed, Lil Cal slung over his shoulder. No blood. No sword through him. Just standing there, a whole man, and he was even smirking, or was it just a normal smile—

"Bro?"

"Hey there, kid."

"Shit, you're alive."

"Nah. I'm pretty dead. You're looking pretty six feet under yourself."

Dave lost it at that point. He was real. Bro was right there and he was real and breathing and being snarky and he was _there_. It was hard to keep track of what happened in the next moment , but consciousness caught up when Dave found his face was buried into Bro's white shirt, his arms wrapped around him and squeezing, feeling and smelling and _knowing_ that Bro was there.

Striders did not show strong emotions, but sometimes even Strider rules did not apply. Dave was pretty sure that thinking his Bro was gone for forever only to find him on his roof was an example of when Strider rules could go fuck themselves for a little while.

The strong hands rubbing his shoulders and ruffling his hair made it clear that Bro was going to definitely let this one slide.

Which was good since Dave was soaking Bro's shirt with uncool tears and making all sorts of unironic sniffling noises.

* * *

><p>"You're a fucking douche nozzle. A late douche nozzle. You're the fucking douche nozzle that finally shows up after the baby has already been shoved out and crying like a little motherfucker."<p>

"Sorry, little dude. I have a lot of little dudes to find and keep an eye on now. It's a fucking Brady Bunch of little dudes. Got here as fast as possible."

"I feel like a tool now. Can't believe I grieved over your stupid ass."

"That explains the battle wounds that Mr. T is sporting."

"You're lucky anything is left of your shit."

"Considering all the other little dudes did knock off all my shit, I'm gonna assume that I have that freaky looking dude over there to thank for that."

"Fuck, he's still here, isn't he?"

"Nah, he's hiding around the corner, giving us some bro space."

"But he probably saw earlier. Christ, bastard always sees me at my uncoolest."

"Man, chill. He doesn't know about the way you're getting my shirt all wet with manly emotions."

"Fuck you."

"Missed you too, Dave."

"You tell all the Daves that."

"Yeah."

Bro's arms held Dave a little tighter.

"'Cause you're all my little dudes."

"Shit, don't pull the emotional shtick."

"Can't handle it?"

Dave did not reply. He took a deep, shaky breath and kept his face hidden against Bro's chest.

* * *

><p>"Jesus, you're still here?"<p>

Tavros jumped a bit before looking up at Dave, his expression revealing all his awkwardness and guilt. He stammered out, "Uh, yeah, sorry, I was going to go but I still get lost finding your floor and, um, I promise I wasn't looking or listening or anything, since you probably didn't want me to, and maybe it's a bit more ok since I didn't do those things and sorry."

Dave shrugged and reached out a hand to help the troll up. "Whatever. It's not like this is the least cool thing you've seen me do."

"I guess."

"Dude, don't leave me hanging."

"Oh." Finally the troll grabbed his hand and was helped to his feet. "Would it be alright if I asked how you are?"

"I'm just fine. My bitch moment is over. I looked grief in the eye and flipped it the bird."

"That's good, right? I'm really happy for you," Tavros said, grinning toothily. Dave was starting to assume that the troll was incapable of being anything but blindingly genuine. He did not have a particularly cool response to that so he just said "Thanks" as he shoved his hands into his pockets. It was clear that the troll had something else to say though, so he waited until Tavros managed to spit it out. "So, is your human guardian going to stay?"

"Bro." Dave could not help the slightest smirk at how the troll's eyes grew wide upon beholding the coolest dude standing behind the boy, leaning on Dave's shoulder like it was no big deal. "Just Bro."

There was no mistaking Tavros' flush as he was overwhelmed with just how utterly sick and ill Bro was. It was probably kind of ridiculous, but Dave had always been pretty proud about having the coolest family member alive. Sure, he was kind of weird sometimes when you lived with him, but as long as people did not know about the smuppets, he was the coolest.

And Tavros was definitely falling under the spell of Strider coolness. No one could handle this much Strider in one sitting without swooning.

His stammering was probably the worst that Dave had ever heard. "Uhh, oh, ok, Bro, I'll call you Bro maybe, if that's ok, uh, Bro."

"Do it. And you're Tav, yeah?"

"Tavros, yes, but you can just say Tav, if you want to, since, you know, I'm totally chill and down with, uh, it."

"Cool. Nice rack."

"What?"

"Your rack. It's nice. Something a dude could get his hands on."

"Uhh, wow, whoa, ok, I don't know what to say but, maybe, thank you?" Tavros was blushing so hard he appeared to be a freaky looking troll Lincoln on a shiny new penny. Dave and Bro shared a hi-five that was so fast the troll did not catch it. Of course his Bro would come up with the perfect line that Dave was almost embarrassed he had not thought of. It was so perfect on so many levels. If he had not already gotten out all his bitch tears, hearing Bro spouting out pure gold again would have made his eyes watery.

But all the bitch tears had been shed, so Dave settled for joining in on the fun by reaching out to grab a horn. "Bro, you don't even know. These things are pretty magical to the touch."

"Dave, uhh-"

"Yeah?" Bro reached over Dave's shoulder to gently run his fingers along the free horn.

It seemed that the double Strider horn grope was a critical hit as Tavros started babbling nonsense with more uhhs and maybes and sorts ofs than actual words. If the troll blushed any harder, he was probably going to pass out from the lack of coppery blood going to any other part of his body.

The moment the word stop passed his lips – "Uhh, this is really, wow, embarrassing, I uh, could you maybe, you know, possibly um, stop? – the Striders had their hands back at their sides.

"Don't stress over it. Just messing with you," Bro said as he straightened up and started down the stairs like it was no big deal. "Consider it a friendly gesture."

Tavros was rubbing at his cheeks, as if trying to inform them that they needed to move that blood somewhere else, and at that glanced at Dave. "Really?"

Dave shrugged as he replied, "Why would he bother messing with you if he didn't give a shit?"

"Oh. Oh wow. Uh, wow, Bro gives a shit about me?"

"It'd be way rude to not give a shit about Dave's boyfriend."

"His what? Dave, what's a boyfriend?" Tavros asked. Dave did not say a word though since he was trying his best to keep his blood from even thinking about sneaking up into his face. "Uh, hello?"

"Nothing. Bro's just messing with me now," Dave managed to flatly reply before starting after Bro.

Tavros followed close behind, although Dave made sure to stay one step in front of him. "But what is a, uh, what was it? Boyfriend?"

"Doesn't matter."

"Is it a friend who's male? Does that mean I'm your boyfriend?"

"No and no way in hell, now drop it."

"I thought the Old Birds raised you better than that. Got to treat your special man with respect. Keep him in the loop."

Bro easily blocked the sword that was aimed at his head in a sneak attack, and even grabbed Dave by the wrist, leaving him dangling from his grip. There was no mistaking the smirk on Bro's face when he turned his head just enough to look at his captive.

There was no way that Dave would be able to convince Bro that his relationship with Tavros was anything but a couple of kids dating, whether or not they knew it.

This stay suddenly became a bit irritating.

And yet, Dave found he could not quite find it in him to worry about it. How could he when the guy he thought was dead and gone was now dead and here?

Dave could put up with a few awkward jokes here and there if it meant Bro was back.

* * *

><p>"So. You guys managed to fuck up the futon."<p>

"Uhh, I'm really sorry about that, since that was me. It was an accident."

"It's fine. Where do you sleep then? With Dave?"

"Yeah. He has to scoot down some because of my horns but, yeah."

"You don't say."

"We're not boyfriends."

"Whatever you say, little dude."

* * *

><p>"Been playing with my toys?"<p>

"Was that not ok? We sort of, you know, thought you weren't coming back? And we needed your turntables for our collaboration."

"Stop worrying. So you guys rap together?"

"Yeah! We made some pretty ill rhymes together."

"I bet you did."

"Bro. Seriously. We're not."

"I'm sure, Dave."

* * *

><p>"Why're you wearing those?"<p>

"These? My, uh, pajamas?"

"Yeah. They look like what I got Dave for his birthday."

"Oh, well, they are Dave's. He gave them to me to sleep in."

"No kidding. Do you wear his boxers too?"

"_Bro_."

"Valid question."

"Um, are those the underwear things? Because I don't really wear those, which is I guess weird for humans?"

"Don't stress about it. I have no problem with you free-balling it in Dave's PJs if he doesn't mind."

Dave was starting to wish that Bro was not pro at dodging shurikans.

* * *

><p>In truth, when Bro was not yanking Dave's chain about Tavros, things were pretty relaxed. Bro would kick back on his computer or sprawl out on the couch to play some games; Dave would either play games with Bro or do his own shit; Tavros would go from one Strider to the other, although he tended towards Dave since he knew him better and, honestly, he seemed a bit intimidated and flustered by Bro. But it was pretty clear that Tavros was warming up to him. Once, Dave walked into the living room to find them playing some shitty racing game and Tavros was absolutely ecstatic about how he was winning. Dave suspected Bro was letting him.<p>

Sometimes they talked. It was usually over microwaved burritos in the kitchen. It was decided that Dave had not noticed Bro's bubble hooking up to his because the environment was the same for the two. Their memories were similar enough that it went undetected. Tavros filled Bro in on anything about trolls that he wanted to know about. Bro would occasionally tell stories about the bubbles he had bumped into and some of the weirdoes he had met.

Once, Tavros knew just who Bro was talking about, and after the story he left to go for a walk. It had to be weird being one of twelve trolls that had been left in the universe and then later to find out that one of the others had died too.

Well, likely she was killed. Dave doubted that she died of old age. But Bro did not know how she died, and even if he did he did not discuss it. Nobody talked about it with Tavros. For being much more expressive with his emotions than the Striders, the troll carefully guarded his personal sorrow and took it outside where neither of them would see.

Bro did not tell any more stories about meeting kids with grey skin, but Dave was suspicious there were others.

Dave asked how someone even found other bubbles since he and Tavros had not collided with any other than Bro's, and they had been around for a while. The man shrugged and said that the fairy troll girl said something about the desire to find or meet other people making the bubble move before leaving him to figure shit out on his own.

The boy knew he was going to have a talk with Aradia about not only keeping information about finding other bubbles from him, but how she damn well knew that Bro was bubble surfing around hunting down Daves and never said a thing. No doubt she had reasons that involved him exploring and learning and creating and some shit like that, but that simply was not going to fly.

But for now, things were good. It was almost like home.

Well, both homes. It was like his home back on earth mixed with his home he had made here in the bubble with Tavros.

When that thought crossed Dave's mind though, he slammed his head against a wall before coolly going back to spinning discs. All the shit that Bro was implying was starting to take root in his head. That had to be it. Making a home with Tavros?

That was embarrassing shit that should have never been thought.

But awkward yanking of chains and sentimental thoughts aside, it was comfortable. Days went by and everything was pretty damn good.

* * *

><p>"Dave. Tav around?"<p>

"No, he's out running."

"Cool. Come here."

Dave shrugged and got up from the couch, heading over to where Bro was. His chest where the puppets were put during transportation was open. "What's up?"

"It's time I showed you my stash," Bro explained, kneeling down to open a little compartment in the chest. Contained within were, just Dave's luck, condoms and lube.

The young teenager could not help a grimace.

"Are we seriously going to have the talk?"

"Grandma Susan told you 'bout the birds and the bees already, right?"

"Yeah. That was awkward."

"Then it's time someone told you about the bee and the other bee. Or the bee and the flower's backdoor. Or the bee and the alien bee."

Dave groaned and dropped his face into his hands. "Tavros and I are _not_ fucking."

Bro gave him a shrug as he tossed a bottle of lube which Dave caught on instinct. "Not yet. But after this you'll know how to."

"Bro."

"Dave."

"_Bro_."

"Sit your ass down and listen."

The next fifteen minutes were by far the longest that Dave had ever experienced. Finally, he was able to escape when Tavros came back. Evidently guardian obligations did not extend to trolls since it was then that Bro wrapped up.

"Just remember. Condoms. Lubricant. Thick for an ass full of dick, thin for sliding right on in. Got it?"

"Pretty sure it's been seared into my skull, just like this scarring memory will be."

"Cool."

"What you guys doing over there?"

"You don't want to know. I wish I didn't."

"Uh, ok."

Dave shoved the lubricant he was still holding into Bro's hand before getting up and making a b-line for his room. Bro and Tavros would not see him again for a couple hours.

The teenager was busy trying to purge his mind of all the information that he knew deep down would never be forgotten.

* * *

><p>"Uhh, Bro?"<p>

"Yeah?"

"Are you going to stay here with Dave? Not that I don't want you to stay, uh, I didn't mean it that way or anything, because you're cool and I don't really dislike you at all-"

"Man, just chill and get to the point."

"Oh, yeah, ok. It's just that, well, Dave was really sad when he thought you were, you know, deader than us, and he didn't say it but I think he missed you a lot? I think it would, maybe, be nice for him if you stayed."

It was silent for a moment, and from around the corner where Dave was hidden, he could not see the look on Bro's face. The teenager had not meant to eavesdrop; he had just been leaving his room to see what the other two were up to. It occurred to him that he should have just turned around and not listened to their conversation like a creeper. But how could he go now when Tavros was voicing questions for the sake of his wellbeing in that embarrassingly straight forward way of his?

And of course he wanted to know the answer too, although he suspected he already knew the answer.

"Can't."

"Oh."

Tavros had no reason to sound that sad on Dave's behalf. There was no reason for Dave to feel disappointed, even when he knew it was coming.

"There are a bunch of Daves I have to keep an eye on. I can't stay with just one."

"Uh, yeah, that makes sense, I guess."

"No need to look so worried about it. He's better off than the other Daves. He doesn't really need me."

"But you're his guardian, right? He sorts of needs you by definition?"

"Nah. He's alright. He's got you now."

"Uhh, I think you are mistaken about our, you know, relationship."

"Even if I was, he's still fine. You've been keeping him company, right?"

"Yes, I guess so, but-"

"And when he flies off the handle, you reel him back in."

"Um, just the once, really-"

"Tav."

"Yeah?"

"You're good for him. I'm entrusting the little dude to you, so don't disappoint."

"Whoa, I uh, Bro I really think that you're, probably, a lot making a mistake because I'm just kind of a loser friend and I can't really do that."

"You're not a loser, dude."

"But, I mean, I can't-"

"You can. I believe in you."

It was quiet then, and even though Dave could not see, he was quite sure that Tavros was probably turning that weird but not unattractive copper blush of his and unable to hide a smile full of fangs and pride. The troll was so easily wound up from just simple compliments.

But in truth, Dave had to admit that even he was pretty red in the face. He wanted to come out from his hiding place and tell Bro he was not some kid that needed someone watching out for him, that he had never been dependant on Tavros' presence, and inform Bro that he was going on about shit he knew nothing about.

He did not though, because maybe Bro did know what he was talking about.

* * *

><p>"Dave?"<p>

"Yeah?"

"Can, uh, we do something else now?"

"Why?"

"No reason."

"Then no, we can't."

"But I, you know, I can't tell you why because he's right there."

"Who, Bro?"

"What? No. Not him."

"Then who?"

"Uh, you know, it's _him_." The troll tilted his head to indicate the puppet smiling at them from up on the bookshelf. Dave quirked a brow at him.

"Lil Cal?"

"Maybe."

"Dude, are you seriously still creeped out by him? It's been a week or something."

"I can't help it! He kind of, uh, makes me really not comfortable."

"Stop worrying. Lil Cal is cool."

"But puppets shouldn't, you know, move and—oh gog." Tavros turned to find the puppet sitting next to him, his head propped against the futon so he was looking up at the troll. Dave snorted.

"Look, he's trying to get to know you."

"No, I don't really want to get to know him so can he maybe go away?"

"He just wants to be your bud."

"I really don't think that – augh, he's touching me, Dave, his hand is on my leg oh gog-"

"Just move it off."

"I don't want to touch him!"

"Give him a bro fist and he'll probably leave you alone."

"A what?"

"Bro fist. Put your hand into a fist and bump it against his fist."

"Dave, I really, really don't want to touch him."

"Alright. Just don't bitch when he's up in your grill or something."

"Oh gog, no, he wouldn't, would he? Uhh, ok, I um, I'll do it, just so he doesn't touch me anymore."

Tavros swallowed hard and slowly raised a shaking hand, curling it into a fist. It was hard for Dave to not to roll his eyes as it took him a whole ten seconds to move his fist from where it was to make contact with Lil Bro's.

The puppet was gone in the blink of an eye, draped over Bro's shoulder as if he was looking at what the man was doing on his computer.

"See? Lil Cal is a cool dude. He just wanted some bro time with you."

Tavros just held his hand close to his chest, as if protecting it from having to face such danger again.

There was no real warning about it. Bro simply got up from where he was and offhandedly commented that it was time he headed out. Dave did his best to not appear disappointed. If Tavros tried to do that same, he was not very good at it at all.

There was no ceremony. They did not even bother moving to the roof since there was not much point, seeing as Bro could leave from wherever he wanted in the bubble. When he bid Tavros goodbye, it was with a fist raised, waiting for the troll to fist bump back. It took some coaching from Dave for Tavros to understand what he was supposed to do.

"Remember what I told you, alright?"

"Uhh, yeah, ok."

Dave and Bro stood staring at one another, both behind their dark shades. The teenager was sure that no one would understand how anything could pass between them in that way, but it could and it did. Bro held out a hand, Dave took it, and they came together to form the coolest brohug ever seen. A normal, sentimental hug was not necessary like when Dave had first seen Bro; there were no emotions that strong anymore. They would be seeing each other again.

No words were necessary.

Lil Cal was hanging on Bro's shoulder as he stood there, mentally starting to pull his bubble away from Dave's. The teenager still did not quite understand how it worked, but eventually he would figure it out when he started bubble surfing himself. Now that the idea of it was sown in his mind, he could not understand how he had just sat around for so long.

When everything seemed to be in place, Bro smirked at Dave.

"What should I say?"

The corners of Dave's mouth curled. Bro would make that reference.

"Make something up."

"Be excellent to each other."

"Party on, dude."

And with that, Bro was gone.

"What was that just now? Was it some sort of, uh, exchange that humans have when they say goodbye?"

"Definitely. We all say that when we say goodbye. You should try it next time we say goodbye to any humans."

"I can't tell if you're messing with me or not."

"What do you think?"

"I think I will just stick with saying goodbye."

"Good choice."


End file.
